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MichelleKnox_2017S-_在健康的时讨论死亡_
To kick the bucket , bite the dust , cash in your chips , check out, depart , expire , launch into eternity ... 翘辫子 辞世 玩完了 离开,逝去,结束 驾鹤西去
kick the bucket:死了;一命呜呼; bite the dust:大败,一败涂地;倒下死去; chips:炸土豆条(chip的复数) depart:v.离开;离去;起程;出发;离职; expire:v.失效,期满,去世; launch into:进入,投入; eternity:n.来世,来生;不朽;永世;
These are all euphemisms we use in humor to describe the one life event we are all going to experience: death. 这些都是我们幽默的委婉语 来描述我们人生中终将经历的事 死亡
euphemisms:n.委婉语;委婉用法;委婉的说法(euphemism的复数形式); humor:n.幽默;心情;情绪;脾气;v.迎合;迁就; describe:v.描述;形容;把…称为;画出…图形;
But most of us don't want to acknowledge death, we don't want to plan for it, and we don't want to discuss it with the most important people in our lives. 但我们大多数人 不想承认死亡 我们不想为它做计划 而且我们不想和人生中 最重要的人们讨论它
I grew up in an Australian community where people got old or sick and passed away, and only the adults attended the funeral . 我在一个澳大利亚团体中长大 其中人们老去或得病 然后去世 然后只有成年人参加葬礼
community:n.社区;[生态]群落;共同体;团体; funeral:n.葬礼;麻烦事;adj.丧葬的,出殡的;
My parents would come home looking sad and drained , but they didn't discuss it with us. 我的父母会回到家 看上去难过且精疲力尽 但他们不和我们讨论这件事
drained:adj.精疲力竭; v.排空; (drain的过去分词和过去式)
So I was ignorant to death and of the grieving process . 所以我不了解死亡 还有吊唁流程
ignorant:adj.无知的;愚昧的; grieving:v.悲伤,悲痛,伤心;使悲伤;使伤心;(grieve的现在分词) process:v.处理;加工;列队行进;n.过程,进行;方法,adj.经过特殊加工(或处理)的;
At 15, I got my invitation . 十五岁时,我收到了邀请
invitation:n.邀请,引诱
A dear neighbor who was like an aunt to me died suddenly of a heart attack , and I attended my first funeral and did my first reading. 一位亲爱的邻居 其于我就像一位阿姨 突然死于了心脏病 然后我参加了我的首个葬礼 并首次读了颂词
heart attack:n.[医]心肌梗塞
I didn't know the tightness in my chest and the dryness in my mouth was normal. 我并不知道我胸中的沉闷 和嘴中的干燥是正常的
tightness:n.紧密,坚固; dryness:n.干燥;冷淡;干燥无味;
The celebrant got some of the facts wrong, and it made me really angry. 司仪把一些事情弄错了 而这让我非常生气
celebrant:n.司仪神父;主持仪式的人;主持弥撒的教父;
He talked about how she loved knitting . 他谈到了她有多喜爱编织
knitting:n.针织;编织物;[外科]骨愈合;v.编织;皱眉(knit的ing形式);
Knitting. 编织
(Laughter) （笑声）
He didn't mention that, at 75, she still mowed her own lawn , built an amazing fish pond in her front yard and made her own ginger beer . 他没有提到,75岁时 她还在自己修剪草坪 在她的前院搭了一个惊人的鱼塘 自制姜汁啤酒
mowed:v.用镰刀等刈草;割草(mow的过去分词); lawn:n.草地;草坪; pond:n.池塘;水池(尤指人工的);v.把…挖成池塘;堵(溪流)水成池; ginger beer:n.姜汁啤酒;一瓶(或一杯)姜汁啤酒;
I'm pretty sure " keen knitter " 我蛮确定“热衷于编织”
keen:adj.敏锐的,敏捷的;渴望的;强烈的;热心的;锐利的;n.痛哭,挽歌; knitter:n.编织者;编织机;
isn't what she would have chosen for her eulogy . 不是她会为自己的悼词选的话
eulogy:n.悼词;颂词;颂扬;赞词;
(Laughter) （笑声）
I believe if we discuss death as part of day-to-day living, we give ourselves the opportunity to reflect on our core values, share them with our loved ones, and then our survivors can make informed decisions without fear or regret of having failed to honor our legacy . 我相信如果我们讨论死亡 像是日常生活的一部分的话 我们给自己机会反思我们的核心价值 和我们爱的人分享它们 然后我们中的幸存者 可以作出有依据的决定 没有未能尊敬我们遗念 的恐惧和遗憾
day-to-day:adj.日常的;逐日的; reflect on:仔细考虑,思考;反省;回想,回顾;怀疑; core:n.核心;要点;果心;[计]磁心;vt.挖...的核; informed:adj.见多识广的; v.通知; (inform的过去分词和过去式) legacy:n.遗赠,遗产;
I am blessed to lead a wonderful, culturally diverse team, and in the last 12 months, we've lost five parents, including my own father, and most recently , a former colleague who died at 41 from bowel cancer . 我很高兴能领导一个 了不起的、多元文化的团队 而在过去的12个月里 我们失去了五位父母 包括我自己的父亲 而不久前,一位前任同事 因大肠癌在41岁去世了
blessed:adj.神圣的; v.求上帝降福于; (bless的过去分词和过去式) culturally:adv.从文化角度,文化意义上;在人文学方面; diverse:adj.不同的;多种多样的;变化多的; recently:adv.最近;新近; colleague:n.同事,同僚; bowel:n.肠;内部最深处 cancer:n.癌症;恶性肿瘤;
We started having open and frank conversations about what we were experiencing. 我们开始坦诚地谈论 我们的经历
frank:adj.坦白的,直率的;老实的;n.免费邮寄特权;v.免费邮寄;
We talked about the practical stuff , the stuff no one prepares you for: dealing with government agencies , hospitals, nursing homes, advanced care directives , funeral directors and extended family members, 我们讨论实际的东西 那些没人讨论的细节: 对付政府机关 医院、护理院 先进的护理指导 殡仪负责人 和大家庭里的成员
practical:adj.实际的;真实的;客观存在的;n.实习课;实践课; stuff:n.东西:物品:基本特征:v.填满:装满:标本: agencies:n.代理;代理处(agency的复数); advanced:adj.先进的; v.前进; (advance的过去式和过去分词形式) directives:n.指令(directive的复数形式);指示; extended family:n.家族;
(Laughter) （笑声）
making decisions about coffins , headstones , headstone wording, headstone font size, all while sleep-deprived . 决定棺材 墓碑 墓志铭 墓志铭字体大小 并且一直都缺乏睡眠
coffins:n.棺材;棺椁;棺木;(coffin的第三人称单数和复数) headstones:n.基石;墓石; font:n.字型;圣洗池(设于教堂中,常为石造); sleep-deprived:睡眠不足;缺乏睡眠的;
We also discussed some of the issues triggered by our various cultural backgrounds, and we realized there can be some significant differences in how we honor the passing of a loved one. 我们还讨论了一些 被我们不同的文化背景影响的事情 然后我们意识到对于怎样缅怀逝者 可能有非常大的区别
issues:n.重要议题;争论的问题;v.宣布;公布;发出;(issue的第三人称单数和复数) triggered:v.发动;引起;触发;开动;起动;(trigger的过去分词和过去式) significant:adj.重大的;有效的;有意义的;值得注意的;意味深长的;n.象征;有意义的事物;
A great example of this is "Sorry Business," 其中一个例子就是
practiced by Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people. 土著人和托雷斯海峡岛居民的丧事
Aboriginal:adj.土著的;原始的;n.土著居民;土生生物; Torres:n.托雷斯(西班牙球星); Strait:adj.狭窄的;苦恼的;n.海峡;困境; Islander:n.岛上居民;
During Sorry Business, family members will take on specific roles and responsibilities, protocols such as limiting the use of photographs, saying the name of the deceased , and holding a smoking ceremony are all a sign of respect and allow for a peaceful transition of the spirit. 在丧事过程中 家人会担任特定的角色和责任 礼节比如说限制照片的使用 说逝者的名字 并且举行吸烟仪式 都是尊敬的表现 并且允许灵魂的安详转移
specific:adj.特殊的,特定的;明确的;详细的;[药]具有特效的;n.特性;细节;特效药; protocols:n.协议; v.拟定议定书; deceased:adj.死去了的;已死的;n.死者; ceremony:n.典礼,仪式;礼节,礼仪;客套,虚礼; transition:n.过渡;转变;变革;变迁;v.经历转变过程;过渡;
These customs can be a complete contrast to those we might practice in Western cultures, where we would honor the memory of a loved one by talking about them and sharing photographs. 这些习俗与西方习俗 大相径庭 其中我们会缅怀有关逝者的记忆 通过谈论他们并且分享照片
contrast:n.对比;对照;反差;明显的差异;v.对比;对照;形成对比;
So my lesson from this last year is, life would be a lot easier to live if we talked about death now, while we're healthy. 于是我去年得到的教训是 人生可以变得容易得多 如果我们现在就谈论死亡 在我们健康的时候
For most of us, we wait until we are too emotional , too ill or too physically exhausted -- and then it's too late. 对于我们大部分人来说 我们等到变得太感性的时候 病入膏肓 或是太精疲力尽的时候—— 而那太晚了
emotional:adj.情绪的;易激动的;感动人的; exhausted:adj.筋疲力尽的; v.使筋疲力尽; (exhaust的过去分词和过去式)
Isn't it time we started taking ownership of our finale on this earth? 现在不是我们开始在世上 掌控自己结局的主权的时候吗？
finale:n.结局;终曲;最后一场;最后乐章;尾声;
So let's get going. 那么让我们开始吧
Do you know what you want when you die? 你知道你死的时候想要什么吗？
Do you know how you want to be remembered? 你知道你想要怎样被记住吗？
Is location important? 地点重要吗？
location:n.地方;地点;位置;定位
Do you want to be near the ocean or in the ocean? 你是想要靠海 还是在海里
(Laughter) （笑声）
Do you want a religious service or an informal party, or do you want to go out with a bang , literally , in a firework ? 你想要一个宗教服务 还是非正式聚会 或是想在巨响中离开 真的,在烟花里？
religious:adj.宗教的;虔诚的;严谨的;修道的;n.修道士;尼姑; informal:adj.非正式的;不拘礼节的;通俗的;日常使用的; bang:n.猛敲; v.猛敲; v.正好; literally:adv.按字面:字面上:确实地: firework:n.烟花;烟火表演;激烈的言辞;令人激动的行动;
(Laughter) （笑声）
When it comes to death, there's so much to discuss, but I want to focus on two aspects : why talking about and planning your death can help you experience a good death, and then reduce the stress on your loved ones; and how talking about death can help us support those who are grieving. 当事情涉及死亡时 有那么多事情要讨论 但是我想要集中在两个方面上: 为什么谈论并计划死亡 可以帮助你死得其所 并且减少你所爱的人的压力 以及怎样讨论死亡可以 帮助我们安慰那些悼念者
aspects:n.方面;相位;面貌(aspect的复数);
So let's start with planning. 那么让我们开始计划吧
How many of you have a will? 在座多少人立了遗嘱
Put your hand up. 举手
Oh, this is fantastic . 哦,这很棒
fantastic:奇异的,空想的
In Australia, 45 percent of adults over the age of 18 do not have a legal will. 在澳大利亚,百分之45 18岁以上的成年人 没有一个法定的遗嘱
legal:adj.法律的;合法的;法定的;
You're a little bit above average. 你们在平均以上一点
This is a startling statistic given that writing a will can actually be quite simple and inexpensive . 这是一个起始数据 鉴于写遗嘱其实可以是 挺简单而且便宜的
startling:adj.惊人的;让人震惊的;极鲜亮的;v.使惊吓;使吓一跳;(startle的现在分词) statistic:n.统计学;统计数字;统计资料;(一项)统计数据;adj.统计(上)的; inexpensive:adj.廉价的;不昂贵的;
So I started asking my friends and neighbors and was really surprised to learn many of them don't have a will, and some couples don't realize they need individual wills. 所以我从询问朋友和邻居们开始 然后非常惊讶地发现 他们许多人没有遗嘱 而且有些夫妻没有意识到 他们需要个人遗嘱
individual:n.个人;有个性的人;adj.单独的;个别的;
The usual explanation was, well, it's all going to go to my partner anyway. 通常的解释是,哎呀 那总归会是我配偶的
So keep in mind that laws vary from state to state and country to country, but this is what happens in New South Wales if you die without leaving a legal will. 那么记住法律在不同的 州和国家之间都有区别 但是这是新南威尔士的情况 如果你没有留下法定遗嘱就死去
keep in mind:记住; vary:vi.变化;变异;违反;vt.改变;使多样化;变奏;
Firstly , a suitable administrator must be appointed by the Supreme Court of New South Wales. 首先,一个合适的 遗产管理人必须由 新南威尔士的最高法院指定
Firstly:adv.首先(主要用于列举条目,论点时);第一; suitable:adj.合适的;适宜的;适当的;适用的; administrator:n.管理人;行政官; appointed:adj.(时间)指定的,约定的; v.任命; (appoint的过去分词和过去式) Supreme Court:最高法院;
Chances are this is someone who would never have met the deceased. 可能这是某个从未见过死者的人
That person is then responsible for arranging your funeral, collecting assets and distributing them after paying debts and taxes. 那个人就要负责安排你的葬礼 收集资产并在付清 债款和税务之后分配它们
responsible:adj.负责的,可靠的;有责任的; arranging:v.安排;筹备;整理;排列;(arrange的现在分词) assets:n.资产;宝贵的人材;(一项)财物;资产;(asset的名词复数) distributing:v.分发;分配;分销;使散开;使分布;分散;(distribute的现在分词) debts:n.负债类,债务(debt的复数形式);
And one of those debts will be the bill for their services. 而其中一个债务就会是 他们的服务账单
This is not someone who would have known you want the four-foot wooden giraffe in your living room to go to the person who helped you carry it halfway across the world, and yes, that's in my will. 这个人不会知道 你想把客厅里 四脚木质长颈鹿 留送给那个帮助你 跨越半个世界运它过来的人 是的,我的遗嘱里有这段
wooden:adj.木制的;木头的;木头似的;死板的 living room:n.客厅;起居室;
(Laughter) （笑声）
If you die leaving a spouse or a domestic partner, then chances are they will receive your estate , but if you are single, it's far more complicated , as parents, siblings , half-siblings and dependents all come into play. 如果你死时有配偶或是同居者 那么他们可能会得到你的遗产 但是如果你单身 这就复杂的多 因为父母、同胞、异父／异母同胞、 和受抚养者都会有影响
spouse:n.配偶;vt.和…结婚; domestic:n.佣人;家佣;家庭纠纷;家庭矛盾;adj.本国的;国内的;家用的;家庭的; estate:n.房地产;财产;身份; complicated:adj.复杂的;难懂的;v.使复杂化;(complicate的过去分词和过去式) siblings:n.兄;弟;姐;妹;(sibling的复数) dependents:n.家属(dependent的复数);从属单元格;关联;
And did you know that if you make a regular donation to charity , that charity may have grounds to make a claim on your estate? 而且你知不知道如果 你定期向慈善机构捐款 那个慈善机构会 有资格获得你的遗产？
donation:n.捐赠;捐赠物;赠送; charity:n.慈善;施舍;慈善团体;宽容;施舍物;
The most important thing to know is the bigger your estate, the more complicated that will will be, and the more expensive that bill. 总重要的事就是 你的遗产越多 那份遗嘱就越复杂 而且账单就越昂贵
So if you don't have a will, I ask you ... 所以如果你没有遗嘱 我请问你
when else in your life have you willingly given money to the government when you didn't have to? 在你人生中有什么时候 自愿的给政府钱 但你其实不需要这么做？
willingly:adv.欣然地;愿意地,乐意地;
(Laughter) （笑声）
I lost my father in February to a progressive lung disease . 我二月时由于进行性肺病 失去了我的父亲
progressive:adj.进步的;先进的;开明的;稳步的;n.进步人士;开明人士;改革派; disease:n.病,[医]疾病;弊病;vt.传染;使…有病;
When dad knew his death was imminent , he had three clear wishes. 当老爸知道死亡临近的时候 他有三个明确的愿望
imminent:adj.即将来临的;迫近的;
He wanted to die at home; he wanted to die surrounded by family; and he wanted to die peacefully , not choking or gasping for air. 他想要在家里去世 他想要被家人围绕着去世 而且他想要安详地去世
peacefully:adv.平静地;和平地; choking:adj.窒息的;闭紧的;v.(使)窒息;使停止呼吸;说不出话来;(choke的现在分词) gasping:adj.喘气的;痉挛的;v.喘气;渴望(gasp的现在分词);
And I'm pleased to say that my family were able to support dad's wishes, and he achieved his goals, and in that sense, he had a good death. 而且我很高兴地说 我家能够支持老爸的愿望 他得偿所愿 可以说,他得以好死
He had the death he planned for. 以自己想要的方式去世
Because dad wanted to die at home, we had to have some pretty tough conversations and fill out a lot of paperwork . 因为老爸想在家逝世 我们进行了不少艰难的对话 并且填了很多文件
paperwork:n.文书工作;
The questions on the forms cover everything from resuscitation to organ donation. 表格上的问题应有尽有 从抢救到器官捐赠
resuscitation:n.复苏;复兴;复活; organ:n.[生物]器官;机构;风琴;管风琴;嗓音;
Dad said, "Take whatever organs you can use." 老爸说,“拿走任何你能用的器官”
organs:n.[生物]器官;机构;风琴(organ的复数);
This was upsetting to my mum, as my dad's health was deteriorating rapidly, and it was no longer the right time to talk about organ donation. 这让我妈妈很难过 因为我父亲的健康在急速下降 而且这再也不是 讨论器官捐赠的正确时机
upsetting:adj.令人心烦意乱的; v.使烦恼; (upset的现在分词) deteriorating:v.退化,恶化(deteriorate的ing形式);
I believe we need to discuss these issues when we are fit and healthy, so we can take the emotion out of it, and then we can learn not just what is important, but why it's important. 我相信我们需要在 强壮且健康的时候讨论这些问题 那样我们可以不带有那么多情感 而且我们不仅可以发现 什么是重要的 还能发现它为什么重要
So as part of my journey , 那么我经历中一部分就是
journey:n.旅行;行程;vi.旅行;
I started engaging my family and friends to find out their thoughts on death, and how they wanted to be remembered. 我开始让我的家人和朋友们 参与来发现他们对于死亡的想法 以及他们想要怎样被记住
engaging:adj.有趣的; v.吸引住(注意力、兴趣); (engage的现在分词)
I discovered you can host a "Death Over Dinner," 我发现你可以办一个“死亡晚餐”
or a "Death Cafe," 或者“死亡咖啡”
which is a great, casual way to introduce the topic ... 会是很好的、随意的 方法来介绍主题
(Laughter) （笑声）
and gain some wonderful insight . 然后得到一些很棒的想法
insight:n.洞察力;洞悉;
(Laughter) （笑声）
Did you know that your body has to be legally disposed of, and you can't just be shoved off a cliff or set fire to in the backyard ? 你知不知道你的身体得 被合法地处理掉 也就是说你不能直接被推下悬崖 或是在后院被烧掉？
disposed:adj.乐意; v.排列; (dispose的过去分词和过去式) shoved:v.猛推;乱挤;推撞;乱放;(shove的过去分词和过去式) cliff:n.悬崖;绝壁; set fire to:点燃,使燃烧; backyard:n.后院;后庭;
(Laughter) （笑声）
In Australia, you have three options . 在澳大利亚,你有三个选择
options:n.选择; v.得到或获准进行选择; (option的三单形式)
The two most common are burial and cremation , but you can also donate your body to science. 最常见的两个是埋葬和火化 但是你还可以把身体捐献给科学
cremation:n.火葬;火化; donate:v.赠送;献(血);捐献(器官);
And I am pleased to report that innovation has touched the world of corpse disposal . 而且我很高兴地报告 创新已经拓展到了 尸体处理的领域了
innovation:n.创新,革新;新方法; corpse:n.尸体; disposal:n.处理;清除;去掉;(企业、财产等的)变卖;
(Laughter) （笑声）
You can now opt for an eco-funeral. 现在你可以选择生态葬礼
You can be buried at the base of a tree in recycled cardboard or a wicker basket, and for those who love the ocean, there are eco-friendly urns that will dissolve at sea. 你可以在回收的硬纸盒 或是柳条筐里 被埋在一棵树的根部 而对于那些热爱海洋的人 也有环保的、可以在海里溶解的骨灰盒
recycled:n.再生纸;回收站;adj.[环境]回收利用的;可循环再造的; cardboard:n.[纸]硬纸板;纸板箱;卡纸板;adj.不真实的;硬纸板制的; wicker:n.柳条;枝条;柳条制品;adj.柳条编织的;装在柳条编织物里的; eco-friendly:adj.对生态环境友好的,不妨害生态环境的;不损坏生态环境的; dissolve:v.溶;使(固体)溶解;解除;终止;解散;消除;n.(电影、电视等画面的)渐隐
Personally , I plan to be cremated , but given that I get seasick , 个人来说,我打算被火花 但由于我晕船
Personally:adv.个人;亲自;本人;就本人而言; cremated:v.焚烧,火化(尸体);(尤指)火葬;(cremate的过去分词和过去式) seasick:adj.晕船的;晕船;
I can think of nothing worse than having my ashes flung into a huge ocean swell . 我想不到有什么比 我的骨灰被扔到巨浪里 更坏的事了
flung:vt.挥动(fling的过去式及过去分词形式); swell:n.海浪的涌动; v.膨胀; adj.很愉快的;
I've actually bought a plot in the rose garden next to my dad. 我其实在玫瑰园里 我老爸旁边买了个墓地
plot:n.情节;阴谋;布局;小块土地;v.密谋;暗中策划;(在地图上)标出;绘制(图表);
I call it my investment property. 我把它当作我的地产投资
investment:n.投资;投入;封锁;
(Laughter) （笑声）
But sadly, there's no tax deduction . 但不幸的是,没能扣税
deduction:n.扣除,减除;推论;减除额;
(Laughter) （笑声）
So if you plan for your death, then your survivors will know how to experience a healthy bereavement without fear or guilt of having failed to honor your legacy. 所以如果你计划自己的死亡 那么你的未亡人能 妥善处理丧亲过程 没有恐惧或是 没能尊重你的遗愿的愧疚
bereavement:n.丧友,丧亲;丧失;
As part of my research, I've been to seminars , read books and talked to palliative care nurses. 作为我研究的一部分 我曾经去过研讨会 读过书并和姑息治疗的护工谈过话
seminars:n.研讨会(seminar的复数);专题讨论会; palliative:n.辩解;缓和剂;暂时姑息的手段;adj.缓和的;掩饰的;可斟酌的;
And I've come to understand as a consequence of not talking about death, we don't know how to be around grief . 而且我逐渐明白 不谈论死亡的一个后果 就是我们不知道怎么面对悲痛
consequence:n.结果;重要性;推论; grief:n.悲痛;忧伤;不幸;
And on the flip side , if we talk about death more, we will become more comfortable with the emotions we experience around grief. 而在另一方面 如果我们更多地谈论死亡 我们会变得更习惯于 经历悲痛的情感
on the flip side:另一方面; emotions:n.强烈的感情;激情;情感;(emotion的复数)
I discovered, this year, it's actually a privilege to help someone exit this life, and although my heart is heavy with loss and sadness, it is not heavy with regret. 今年我发现 帮助别人走完人生最后一里 是一种荣幸 而且虽然我心中充斥着伤痛 它并没有悔恨
privilege:n.特权;优待;v.给与…特权;特免;
I knew what dad wanted, and I feel at peace knowing I could support his wishes. 我知道老爸想要什么 而且我从容地知道 我可以支持他的愿望
My dad's last 24 hours were in a peaceful coma , and after days of around-the-clock care, we had time to sit, hold his hand, and say goodbye. 我父亲的最后24小时 在安详的昏迷中度过 而在许多天昼夜不停的看护后 我们有时间坐下来 握住他的手 然后道别
coma:n.[医]昏迷;[天]彗形像差; around-the-clock:adj.连续不断的;日夜不停的;
He passed away on a Monday morning just before breakfast, and after the doctor came and we waited for the funeral home, 他在一个周一的早晨去世了 就在早餐之前 而在医生到来之后 我们等待着殡仪馆的到来
I went into the kitchen, and I ate a big bowl of porridge . 我走进了厨房 然后我吃了一大碗粥
porridge:n.麦片粥;面糊
When I told some of my friends this, they were really shocked. 当我告诉一些朋友这件事时 他们非常震惊
'"How could you eat at a time like that?" “你在那种时候怎么吃得下东西？”
Well, I was hungry. 呃,我很饿
(Laughter) （笑声）
You see, grief impacted my sleep and my ability to concentrate , but it never impacted my stomach. I was always hungry. 你看,悲痛影响了我的睡眠 和我的集中注意能力 但它从来没影响过我的胃 我一直都很饿
impacted:adj.压紧的;结实的;嵌入的;(人口)稠密的;v.装紧;挤满(impact的过去分词); concentrate:n.浓缩物;v.聚精会神;集中(注意力);使…集中(或集合、聚集);(使)浓缩;
(Laughter) （笑声）
It's different for all of us, and it's really important that we acknowledge that. 这对我们所有人都不同 而且我们承认这点真的很重要
So if we don't talk about our death and the death of loved ones, how can we possibly support a friend, a colleague, a neighbor who is grieving? 所以如果我们不谈论自己的死亡 和我们爱的人的死亡 我们怎么有可能支持 一位正在悲痛中的 朋友、同事、邻居呢？
How do we support someone who has lost someone suddenly, like an accident or suicide ? 我们怎么支持某个 突然失去别人的人 比如一场意外或是自杀？
suicide:n.自杀;自杀行为;自杀者;adj.自杀的;v.自杀;vi.自杀;
We tend to avoid them ... 我们尽量避开这些话题
not because we don't care, because we don't know what to say. 不是因为我们不在乎 而是因为我们不知道说什么
We know as a friend we can't fix it, we can't take away that pain, so we say things to fill that awkward silence, sometimes things we regret saying. 我们知道作为一个朋友 我们解决不了这件事 我们不能带走那种伤痛 所以我们说些什么 来填补那种尴尬的沉默 有时候是我们后悔说出的话
awkward:adj.尴尬的;笨拙的;棘手的;不合适的;
Examples would be: "At least he isn't suffering anymore." 比如说 “至少他不再受折磨了”
'"At least you've got your memories." “至少你有你的回忆”
'"At least you don't have to pay for hospital parking anymore." “至少你不需要再付医院的停车费了”
(Laughter) （笑声）
Really, we don't need to say anything. 真的,我们什么都不需要说
We just need to be. 我们只需要在
Be patient , be understanding, and be a listener. 有耐心 去体谅 然后当个聆听者
patient:adj.有耐心的,能容忍的;n.病人;患者;
And if you can't be any of those things, then please, be the person who makes the lasagna , the curry or the casserole , because your offerings will be greatly appreciated . 而如果你这些都做不到 那么请你,当那个做 千层面、咖喱或是炖菜的人 我保证大家会很感激
lasagna:n.烤宽面条;卤汁面条; curry:vt.用咖喱烧,给…加咖喱粉;梳刷;鞭打;n.咖哩粉,咖喱;咖哩饭菜; casserole:n.勺皿;砂锅菜;餐桌上用有盖的焙盘;vi.用焙盘焙; offerings:n.供品,供奉祖先神佛的菜等;奉献(物);样片;提供之物(offering的复数形式); greatly:adv.很,大大地;非常; appreciated:v.欣赏;感激;理解;(appreciate的过去分词和过去式)
(Laughter) （笑声）
I've been to 10 funerals in the last year, one of which I helped arrange . 我去年去过十场葬礼 策划了其中一场
funerals:n.葬礼;丧礼;出殡;(funeral的复数) arrange:v.安排;排列;整理;
They ran the full gamut : a very solemn Greek Orthodox service, four Catholic requiem masses and a garden party where I made a toast while scattering my friend's ashes around her garden with a soup ladle . 他们进行了全套过程 一个非常庄严的希腊东正教仪式 四个天主教安魂弥撒曲 和一个花园聚会 我一边用汤勺把 朋友的骨灰洒在花园里 一边致辞
gamut:n.全音阶;全音域;整个范围; solemn:adj.庄严的,严肃的;隆重的,郑重的; Orthodox:adj.正统的;传统的;惯常的;东正教的;n.正统的人;正统的事物; Catholic:adj.天主教的;宽宏大量的;n.天主教徒;罗马天主教; requiem:n.安魂曲;追思弥撒; masses:n.民众;大量(mass的复数);包块;v.集中;聚集(mass的三单形式); garden party:n.游园会; toast:n.干杯; v.为…干杯; scattering:n.散射;分散;adj.分散的;v.散射;散布;驱散(scatter的ing形式); ladle:vt.不分对象予以赠送;以杓舀取;n.钢水包;杓子;长柄杓;
(Laughter) （笑声）
I have carried, kissed, written on and toasted coffins with a shot of ouzo . 我抬过、吻过、写过、 并用一杯茴香酒敬过棺材
toasted:v.为…举杯敬酒; (toast的过去分词和过去式) ouzo:n.(希腊)茴香烈酒;饭后酒;
I have worn all black, all color and a party dress. 我穿过全黑 所有颜色和一条派对裙
Despite the vast differences in sendoff , despite me being at times out of my comfort zone doing something I've never done before, 尽管送别会的巨大不同 尽管我有时候在舒适区外 做着以前从没做过的事
Despite:prep.尽管,不管;n.轻视;憎恨;侮辱; sendoff:n.送行;欢送; comfort zone:n.舒适区;最佳状态;
I drew comfort from one thing -- knowing that this is what each person would have wanted. 我从一件事情得取安慰—— 知道每个人都以他们想要的方式离世
So what do I want? 那么我想要什么？
Well, I like to be organized , so I have the will, 呃,我想要有条理 所以我有遗嘱
organized:adj.有组织的; v.组织; (organize的过去分词和过去式)
I'm a registered organ donor , and I have my investment property. 我是注册器官捐献者 还有我那块地产投资
registered:adj.登记过的;记名的;挂号的;v.登记;注册;(register的过去式和过去分词) donor:n.捐赠者;供者;赠送人;adj.捐献的;经人工授精出生的;
All that is left is planning my sendoff, a big party, lots of champagne , color, laughter, and of course, music to remember me by. 剩下的就是策划我的送别会了 一个盛大的聚会,许多香槟 颜色、笑声、以及当然 记念我的音乐
champagne:n.香槟酒;香槟酒色;
Thank you. 谢谢
(Applause) （掌声）