返回首页

MeganPhelpsRoper_2017S-_我在威斯特布_浸信会长大。这是我离开的理由。_
I was a blue-eyed ,chubby-cheeked five-year-old when I joined my family on the picket line for the first time. 那时我是个碧眼丰颊的五岁小孩, 第一次跟着家人一起去示威抗议。
blue-eyed:adj.蓝眼睛的;心爱的; picket line:n.纠察线;纠察队人墙;
My mom made me leave my dolls in the minivan . 我妈妈要我把洋娃娃留在休旅车上。
minivan:n.小型货车;
I'd stand on a street corner in the heavy Kansas humidity , surrounded by a few dozen relatives , with my tiny fists clutching a sign that I couldn't read yet: "Gays are worthy of death." 我站在闷湿的堪萨斯街角, 几十个亲戚围绕在身边, 我的拳头紧握着 一个我还看不懂的示威牌: 「同性恋该死。」
Kansas:n.堪萨斯州(美国州名); humidity:n.[气象]湿度;湿气; relatives:n.亲戚;亲属;同类事物;(relative的复数) clutching:v.紧握;抱紧;抓紧(clutch的现在分词) worthy:adj.值得的; n.杰出人物;
This was the beginning. 那就是开端。
Our protests soon became a daily occurrence and an international phenomenon , and as a member of Westboro Baptist Church, 我们的抗议很快就变成日常事件, 以及国际注目的焦点, 身为威斯特布路浸信会的一员,
protests:v.抗议;反对(protest的三单形式);n.抗议(protest的复数); occurrence:n.发生;出现;存在;发生的事情; phenomenon:n.现象;杰出的人;非凡的人(或事物); Baptist:n.施洗者约翰,施洗者;浸信会教友;
I became a fixture on picket lines across the country. 我成为到全国示威的固定班底。
fixture:n.设备;固定装置;固定于某处不大可能移动之物;
The end of my antigay picketing career and life as I knew it, came 20 years later, triggered in part by strangers on Twitter who showed me the power of engaging the other. 我反同性恋的示威生涯, 以及我熟悉的那种生活, 在 20 年后结束, 有一部分是因为推特上的陌生人, 他们让我看见与他人互动的力量。
antigay:adj.[美国英语]仇视同性恋的,反同性恋的; picketing:v.在…外抗议;进行罢工纠察;(picket的现在分词) career:n.职业;事业;生涯;经历; triggered:v.发动;引起;触发;开动;起动;(trigger的过去分词和过去式) engaging:adj.有趣的; v.吸引住(注意力、兴趣); (engage的现在分词)
In my home, life was framed as an epic spiritual battle between good and evil . 在我家, 生活被框架成善恶间的 伟大属灵争战。
framed:v.给…做框;给…镶边;制订;拟订;(frame的过去分词和过去式) epic:adj.史诗的,叙事诗的;n.史诗;叙事诗;史诗般的作品; spiritual:n.圣歌(尤指美国南部黑人的);adj.精神的,心灵的; evil:adj.邪恶的;不幸的;有害的;讨厌的;n.罪恶,邪恶;不幸;
The good was my church and its members, and the evil was everyone else. 善的是我的教会与教友, 恶的则是其他所有人。
My church's antics were such that we were constantly at odds with the world, and that reinforced our otherness on a daily basis. 我的教会古怪的论点是, 我们是不属这世界的, 而那每天都在 加深我们与别人的不同。
antics:n.滑稽动作;古怪姿态; constantly:adv.不断地;时常地; odds:n.几率;胜算;不平等;差别; reinforced:adj.加固的;加强的;加筋的;v.加强;增援;(reinforce的过去式和过去分词) otherness:n.差异性;相异;他物;
'" Make a difference between the unclean and the clean," 「要把洁净的和不洁净的都分别出来。」
Make a difference between:区别对待;区别;区分; unclean:adj.不纯洁的;行为不检的;
the verse says, and so we did. 经上这么说, 我们就如此行。
verse:n.诗,诗篇;韵文;诗节;vi.作诗;vt.使熟练,使精通;
From baseball games to military funerals , we trekked across the country with neon protest signs in hand to tell others exactly how "unclean" they were and exactly why they were headed for damnation . 从棒球比赛到国军葬礼, 我们全国旅行尾随在后, 举着闪亮的示威牌, 告诉别人他们有多「不洁净」, 以及为什么他们将被定罪。
military:adj.军事的;军人的;适于战争的;n.军队;军人; funerals:n.葬礼;丧礼;出殡;(funeral的复数) trekked:n.艰苦跋涉;vt.(牛)拉(货车);搬运;vi.艰苦跋涉; neon:n.霓虹灯;氖(10号元素,符号Ne); damnation:n.诅咒;非难;被罚下地狱;int.糟了;该死;
This was the focus of our whole lives. 这是我们一生的重点。
This was the only way for me to do good in a world that sits in Satan's lap. 这是我在撒但怀抱的世界中 唯一能做的善事。
And like the rest of my 10 siblings , 就像我其他十位手足,
siblings:n.兄;弟;姐;妹;(sibling的复数)
I believed what I was taught with all my heart, and I pursued Westboro's agenda with a special sort of zeal . 我由衷相信我所受的教导, 而我也以特别火热的心 追求威斯特布路的计画。
pursued:v.追击,追踪;继续从事(pursue的过去分词形式); agenda:n.议事日程; zeal:n.热情;热心;热诚;
In 2009, that zeal brought me to Twitter. 2009 年,这份火热把我带到推特。
Initially , the people I encountered on the platform were just as hostile as I expected. 一开始,我在那个平台上遇到的人 就像我预期般的不友善。
Initially:adv.最初,首先;开头; encountered:v.遭遇,遇到;偶然碰到;意外地遇见;(encounter的过去分词和过去式) platform:n.平台; v.把…放在台上[放在高处; hostile:adj.敌意的; n.敌对分子;
They were the digital version of the screaming hordes 他们就是我从小在示威里看到的
digital:adj.数字的;手指的;n.数字;键; hordes:n.游牧部落;一大群(horde的复数);v.成群结队(horde的第三人称单数);
I'd been seeing at protests since I was a kid. 网路版叫嚣者。
But in the midst of that digital brawl , a strange pattern developed. 但是在这片数位世界的吶喊中, 发展出一个奇特的模式。
midst:n.当中,中间;prep.在…中间(等于amidst); brawl:vi.争吵;打架;大喊大叫;n.争吵;打架;vt.大声喊出;为…争吵;
Someone would arrive at my profile with the usual rage and scorn , 有人会在我的版上 留下愤怒与蔑视的话,
profile:n.轮廓;简介;形象;外形;v.扼要介绍;概述;写简介; rage:n.狂怒;暴怒;(某情况引起的)愤怒;v.发怒;怒斥;猛烈地继续;激烈进行; scorn:n.轻蔑;嘲笑;藐视的对象;vt.轻蔑;藐视;不屑做;vi.表示轻蔑;表示鄙视;
I would respond with a custom mix of Bible verses , pop culture references and smiley faces. 我就会用一段混合着 圣经经文、流行文化 及笑脸的文字回应。
respond:vi.回答;作出反应;承担责任;n.应答;唱和; Bible:n.有权威的书; verses:诗; references:n.提到; v.查阅; (reference的第三人称单数和复数) smiley:n.微笑符(等于smily);adj.微笑的;引起微笑的;
They would be understandably confused and caught off guard , but then a conversation would ensue . 你可以理解他们会觉得 有点糊涂、措手不及, 然后对话就会随之开展。
understandably:adv.可理解地; confused:adj.困惑的; v.使糊涂; (confuse的过去分词和过去式) off guard:不提防;不警惕; ensue:vi.跟着发生,接着发生;继起;vt.追求;
full of genuine curiosity on both sides. 两边都充满了纯粹的好奇心。
genuine:adj.真实的,真正的;诚恳的; curiosity:n.好奇,好奇心;珍品,古董,古玩;
How had the other come to such outrageous conclusions about the world? 另一边的人怎么会对这世界 做出这么怪的结论？
outrageous:adj.粗暴的;可恶的;令人吃惊的; conclusions:n.结论,总结;决定;(conclusion的复数)
Sometimes the conversation even bled into real life. 有时候对话还会在真实生活上演。
bled:v.流血;失血;给(某人)放血;长期榨取(某人的钱);(bleed的过去分词和过去式)
People I'd sparred with on Twitter would come out to the picket line to see me when I protested in their city. 在推特上与我争论互骂的人 会到我的示威地点来看我, 如果我正好在他们的城市里。
sparred:v.练习拳击;虚晃一拳;辩论,争论;(spar的过去分词和过去式) protested:v.(公开)反对;抗议;坚决地表示;申辩;(protest的过去分词和过去式)
A man named David was one such person. 一位名叫大卫的男士就是其中之一。
He ran a blog called "Jewlicious," 他有个部落格叫「犹太真妙」,
blog:n.博客;部落格;网络日志;
and after several months of heated but friendly arguments online, he came out to see me at a picket in New Orleans . 在数个月激烈但友善的网上辩论后, 他跑出来到我在 纽奥良的示威地点看我。
Orleans:n.奥尔良(法国城市);
He brought me a Middle Eastern dessert from Jerusalem , where he lives, and I brought him kosher chocolate and held a "God hates Jews" sign. 他从住的地方耶路撒冷带了一种中东点心给我, 而我带了一盒符合犹太教规 洁净认证的巧克力给他, 手上还拿着「神恨犹太人」的标牌。
Eastern:adj.东方的;向东的;东部的;东方国家的;n.东方人;东正教信徒; dessert:n.甜食;甜品;餐后甜点; Jerusalem:n.耶路撒冷(以色列首都); kosher:adj.合适的;符合犹太教教规的,干净的;
(Laughter) （笑声）
There was no confusion about our positions, but the line between friend and foe was becoming blurred . 我们的立场壁垒分明, 但是彼此之间的 敌友界线却愈来愈模糊。
confusion:n.困惑;混淆;混同;困窘; foe:n.敌人;反对者;危害物; blurred:adj.模糊不清的; v.玷污; (blur的过去式和过去分词)
We'd started to see each other as human beings, and it changed the way we spoke to one another. 我们以同而为人的观点来展开碰面, 这也改变我们彼此交谈的态度。
It took time, but eventually these conversations planted seeds of doubt in me. 这要花点时间, 但最终这些对话 在我的心中种下怀疑的种子。
eventually:adv.最后,终于;
My friends on Twitter took the time to understand Westboro's doctrines , and in doing so, they were able to find inconsistencies 我在推特上的朋友花时间 了解威斯特布路的教义, 也因为这样, 他们能找到我一辈子
doctrines:主义;学说;教义;信条(doctrine的复数); inconsistencies:矛盾;
I'd missed my entire life. 都没看到的矛盾点。
Why did we advocate the death penalty for gays when Jesus said, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone?" 为什么我们强烈主张 同性恋要判死刑, 耶稣却说「你们中间谁是没有罪的, 谁就可以先拿石头打她」？
advocate:v.拥护;支持;提倡;n.支持者;提倡者;辩护律师;出庭辩护人; death penalty:死刑; Jesus:int.上帝啊:天哪:n.耶稣:耶稣基督: sin:n.罪恶;罪行;过错;过失;恶行;v.犯戒律;犯过失;
How could we claim to love our neighbor while at the same time praying for God to destroy them? 我们怎么能宣称我们爱自己的邻舍, 却在同时祷告神摧毁他们？
claim:v.要求;声称;需要;认领;n.要求;声称;索赔;断言;值得; at the same time:同时;另一方面;与此同时;
The truth is that the care shown to me by these strangers on the internet was itself a contradiction . 真相是这些人在网路上 对我显出的关心, 本身就是一场矛盾。
contradiction:n.矛盾;反驳;驳斥;
It was growing evidence that people on the other side were not the demons I'd been led to believe. 愈来愈多的证据显示 另一边的人并不是 我被教导相信的恶魔。
evidence:n.证据,证明;迹象;明显;v.证明; on the other side:另一面;在另一边; demons:n.恶魔;魔鬼;心魔;邪念;(demon的复数)
These realizations were life-altering . 这样的领悟改变了我的人生。
life-altering:改变生活的;改变人生的;
Once I saw that we were not the ultimate arbiters of divine truth but flawed human beings, 一旦我看到我们并不是 神圣真理的终极审判者, 而是不完美的人类,
ultimate:adj.最终的;极限的;根本的;n.终极;根本;基本原则; arbiters:n.[法]仲裁者;裁决人; divine:adj.神圣的;非凡的;天赐的;极好的;v.占卜;预言;用占卜勘探;n.牧师;神学家; flawed:adj.有缺陷的;有瑕疵的;有裂纹的;
I couldn't pretend otherwise. 我再也不能假装下去。
I couldn't justify our actions — especially our cruel practice of protesting funerals and celebrating human tragedy . 我再也无法把我们的行动合理化── 特别是我们抗议葬礼的残酷行动, 以及庆祝人类的悲剧。
justify:v.证明合法;整理版面;替…辩护; especially:adv.尤其;特别;格外;十分; protesting:v.(公开)反对;抗议;坚决地表示;申辩;(protest的现在分词) tragedy:n.悲惨的事;不幸;灾难;悲剧作品;
These shifts in my perspective contributed to a larger erosion of trust in my church, and eventually it made it impossible for me to stay. 这些自身观点的改变, 大举侵蚀我对所属教会的信任, 最终让我无法再待下去。
shifts:n.转移; v.转移; (shift的第三人称单数) perspective:n.观点;远景;透视图;adj.透视的; contributed:v.捐献,捐赠(尤指款或物); (contribute的过去式和过去分词) erosion:n.侵蚀,腐蚀;
In spite of overwhelming grief and terror, 垄罩在悲伤与害怕之下,
In spite of:尽管;不管,不顾; overwhelming:adj.势不可挡的; v.压倒; (overwhelm的现在分词) grief:n.悲痛;忧伤;不幸;
I left Westboro in 2012. 我于 2012 年离开威斯特布路。
In those days just after I left, the instinct to hide was almost paralyzing . 刚离开的时候, 想要躲起来的本能几乎要瘫痪我。
instinct:n.本能;天性;直觉;adj.充满的; paralyzing:v.使瘫痪或麻痹;使惊愕;(paralyze的现在分词)
I wanted to hide from the judgement of my family, who I knew would never people whose thoughts and opinions had meant everything to me. 我想要从家人的批判声中躲起来, 我知道他们这一辈子 而他们的想法及意见 对我却意味着一切。
And I wanted to hide from the world 我也想从我拒绝已久的
I'd rejected for so long — people who had no reason at all to give me a second chance after a lifetime of antagonism . 世界中藏起来 ── 这些人没有任何道理 要给我第二次机会, 因我们已经敌对了这么久。
rejected:adj.被拒的;不合格的;v.拒绝,驳回;(reject的过去式和过去分词) antagonism:n.对抗,敌对;对立;敌意;
And yet, unbelievably , they did. 然而,不可置信的是, 他们给了。
unbelievably:adv.难以置信地;不可信地;
The world had access to my past because it was all over the internet — thousands of tweets and hundreds of interviews , everything from local TV news to "The Howard Stern Show" — but so many embraced me with open arms anyway. 这个世界看得到我的过去, 因为网路上记录了所有── 成千上万的推文,数以百计的访谈, 从地方电视台到 全国的「霍华史登秀」── 却还是有这么多人张开膀臂拥抱我。
tweets:n.啾啾声,小鸟叫声(tweet的复数形式);v.鸣叫(tweet的三单形式); interviews:n.面试; v.对(某人)进行面试(或面谈); embraced:v.拥抱;欣然接受,乐意采纳;信奉;包含;(embrace的过去分词和过去式)
I wrote an apology for the harm I'd caused, but I also knew that an apology could never undo any of it. 我写了篇文章为我造成的伤害赔罪, 但是我也知道一篇道歉文 并不能消弥什么。
All I could do was try to build a new life and find a way somehow to repair some of the damage. 我能做的就是试着建立新生活, 找个方法弥补过去的伤害。
somehow:adv.以某种方法;莫名其妙地; repair:v.修理;修补;修缮;补救;n.修理;修补;修缮;
People had every reason to doubt my sincerity , but most of them didn't. 他们有理由怀疑我的诚意, 但是大部分的人都没有怀疑。
sincerity:n.真实,诚挚;
given my history, it was more than I could've hoped for — forgiveness and the benefit of the doubt . 考虑到我的历史, 这真的超过我所求的 ── 饒恕与宁愿相信我。
forgiveness:n.宽恕;原谅;宽宏大量 the benefit of the doubt:暂且相信;姑且信之;
It still amazes me. 这仍然让我惊讶。
I spent my first year away from home adrift with my younger sister, who had chosen to leave with me. 我离家的第一年 和我的妹妹四处流浪, 她选择跟我一起离开。
adrift:adj.漂泊的;漂浮着的;adv.随波逐流地;漂浮着;
We walked into an abyss , but we were shocked to find the light and a way forward in the same communities we'd targeted for so long. 我们走进一个黑暗的深渊, 但是我们很惊讶地发现 带领我们前进的光及道路, 竟然来自我们许久以来 一直攻击的同一个社群。
abyss:n.深渊;深邃,无底洞,地狱; communities:n.社区;社会;团体;共有(community的复数)
David, my "Jewlicious" friend from Twitter, invited us to spend time among a Jewish community in Los Angeles. 大卫, 我在推特上交到的妙犹太朋友, 邀请我们待在一个 位于洛杉矶的犹太社区。
Jewish:adj.犹太人的;犹太族的; community:n.社区;[生态]群落;共同体;团体;
We slept on couches in the home of a Hasidic rabbi and his wife and their four kids — the same rabbi that I'd protested three years earlier with a sign that said,"Your rabbi is a whore ." 我们睡在一对哈西迪派 犹太拉比夫妇家的沙发上, 他们有四个小孩 ── 三年前我曾对这位拉比抗议过, 我举牌说「你们的拉比是娼妓！」
couches:n.睡椅,长沙发;床;卧榻;vi.蹲伏,埋伏;躺着;vt.使躺下;表达;弯下; Hasidic:adj.哈西德派的(犹太教); rabbi:n.拉比(犹太人的学者);法师;犹太教律法专家;先生; whore:v.卖淫,娼妓;n.娼妓,淫妇;
We spent long hours talking about theology and Judaism and life while we washed dishes in their kosher kitchen and chopped vegetables for dinner. 我们花了好长的时间谈论 犹太教的神学及生活, 同时我们也在他们符合 犹太教义的洁净厨房洗碗, 切菜准备晚餐。
theology:n.神学;宗教体系; Judaism:n.犹太教;(总称)犹太人;犹太主义; chopped:v.切碎;剁碎;砍;劈;降低;取消;(chop的过去分词和过去式)
They treated us like family. 他们待我们就像家人。
treated:v.以…态度对待;把…看作;(treat的过去分词和过去式)
They held nothing against us, and again I was astonished . 他们并不责难我们, 我再次感到惊讶。
astonished:adj.吃惊的;
That period was full of turmoil , but one part I've returned to often is a surprising realization I had during that time — that it was a relief and a privilege to let go of the harsh judgments that instinctively ran through my mind about nearly every person I saw. 那段时间充满了混乱, 但是我常常提到的一点, 是在那段期间意外领悟到的一件事: 那是一种解脱及恩典, 我再也不用对 几乎我看到的每一个人, 直觉地从心中发出严厉批判。
turmoil:n.混乱,骚动; realization:n.实现;领悟; relief:n.救济;减轻,解除;安慰;浮雕; privilege:n.特权;优待;v.给与…特权;特免; harsh:adj.严厉的;严酷的;刺耳的;粗糙的;刺目的; judgments:判断; instinctively:adv.本能地;
I realized that now I needed to learn. 我领悟到我需要学习。
I needed to listen. 我需要倾听。
This has been at the front of my mind lately, because I can't help but see in our public discourse so many of the same destructive impulses that ruled my former church. 最近这件事一直在我的心中挂怀, 因为我实在不能不看见 在公众演讲中, 充斥着太多破坏性的冲动行事, 就像我的前教会一样。
discourse:n.论述;谈话;演讲;vi.演说;谈论;讲述;vt.说出;演奏出; destructive:adj.破坏的;毁灭性的;有害的,消极的; impulses:n.[心理]冲动; v.推动(impulse的第三人称单数);
We celebrate tolerance and diversity more than at any other time in memory, and still we grow more and more divided. 我们从没有像现在一样 如此歌颂着包容心与多样化, 然而我们却愈来愈分裂。
tolerance:n.公差;耐量;宽容;容忍; diversity:n.差异(性):多样性:多样化:
We want good things — justice , equality,freedom, dignity , prosperity — but the path we've chosen looks so much like the one 我们想要好的东西 ── 正义、平等、自由、尊严、繁榮── 然而我们选择的路径 却更像我在四年前
justice:n.公平;公正;司法制度;审判; dignity:n.尊严;高贵; prosperity:n.繁荣,成功;
I walked away from four years ago. 所选择离开的道路。
We've broken the world into us and them, only emerging from our bunkers long enough to lob rhetorical grenades at the other camp. 我们把世界分成我们与他们, 只有要对另一个阵营进行 言语的轰炸攻击时,才会从自己的地堡中探出身来。
emerging:adj.新兴的;v.出现,浮现,露出;暴露;(emerge的现在分词) bunkers:n.沙坑;[能源]燃料(bunker复数); rhetorical:adj.修辞的;修辞学的;夸张的; grenades:n.手榴弹(grenade的复数); v.扔手榴弹;
We write off half the country as out-of-touch liberal elites or racist misogynist bullies . 我们大笔一挥,就把一半的国家写成不知民间疾苦的自由派菁英, 或是有种族偏见、厌恶女性的霸凌。
liberal:adj.宽宏大度的; n.理解且尊重他人意见的人; elites:n.精英(elite的复数); racist:n.种族主义者;种族主义的; misogynist:n.厌恶女人的人; bullies:n.仗势欺人者;横行霸道者;v.恐吓;伤害;胁迫;(bully的第三人称单数和复数)
No nuance , no complexity , no humanity . 没有细分、没有复杂性、没有人性。
nuance:n.细微差别; complexity:n.复杂性;难以理解的局势 humanity:n.人类;人道;仁慈;人文学科;
Even when someone does call for empathy and understanding for the other side, the conversation nearly always devolves into a debate about who deserves more empathy. 即使有人喊出对另一方 要有同理心及了解, 对话几乎都会变成 辩论谁该得到更多同理心。
empathy:n.神入;移情作用;执着; devolves:vi.被移交;转让;vt.转移;移交;使滚下;衰落; debate:n.辩论;争论;考虑;v.辩论;争论;考虑; deserves:v.值得;应得;应受;(deserve的第三人称单数)
And just as I learned to do, we routinely refuse to acknowledge the flaws in our positions or the merits in our opponent's. 就像我学到的, 我们也一直拒绝承认自己的不完美, 或是敌对方的优点。
routinely:adv.例行公事地;老一套地; flaws:n.[材]缺陷;[力]裂缝(flaw的复数);v.有裂纹;使有裂缝(flaw的单三形式); merits:n.优点(merit的复数);功绩;是非曲直;
Compromise is anathema . 妥协该受咒诅。
Compromise:n.妥协;折中;互让;和解;v.妥协;违背(原则);达不到(标准);使陷入危险; anathema:n.诅咒;革出教门;被诅咒者;令人厌恶的人;
We even target people on our own side when they dare to question the party line . 我们甚至攻击自己人, 因为他们胆敢质问政策路线。
party line:n.共同线;汇流;多线组;
This path has brought us cruel, sniping , deepening polarization , and even outbreaks of violence . 这条路为我们带来残酷、 抨击,加深两极化, 甚至暴力相向。
sniping:v.狙击;诽谤(snipe的现在分词); deepening:n.加深,延深;向下侵蚀;v.使深化;加深(deepen的现在分词); polarization:n.极化;偏振;两极分化; outbreaks:n.(战争的)爆发;(疾病的)发作;vi.爆发; violence:n.暴力;侵犯;激烈;歪曲;
I remember this path. 我还记得这条路。
It will not take us where we want to go. 它不会带我们达到目的。
What gives me hope is that we can do something about this. 我之所以还怀抱希望, 是因为我们能为之做点什么。
What gives:出了什么事;
The good news is that it's simple, and the bad news is that it's hard. 好消息是它很简单, 坏消息是它很难。
We have to talk and listen to people we disagree with. 我们必须与意见相左的人 对话及聆听。
how the other side came to their positions. 另一边的人怎么会有这样的立场。
It's hard because righteous indignation , that sense of certainty that ours is the right side, is so seductive . 这很难,因为义愤填膺, 我们的自以为是, 是如此难以抗拒。
righteous:adj.正义的;正直的;公正的; indignation:n.愤慨;愤怒;义愤; certainty:n.必然;确实;确实的事情; seductive:adj.有魅力的;性感的;引人注意的;
It's hard because it means extending empathy and compassion to people who show us hostility and contempt . 这很难,因为这意味着 我们要展示出同理与同情, 对象却是向自己显现敌意和蔑视的人。
extending:v.使伸长;扩大;扩展;延长;(extend的现在分词) compassion:n.同情;怜悯; hostility:n.敌意;战争行动; contempt:n.轻视,蔑视;耻辱;
The impulse to respond in kind is so tempting , but that isn't who we want to be. 要显露善意的冲动是如此诱人, 然而我们不想成为那样的人。
tempting:adj.吸引人的;诱惑人的;v.引诱;(tempt的现在分词);
We can resist . 我们可以抗拒。
resist:v.抵制;阻挡;反抗;回击;抵抗;忍住;n.防染剂;防蚀用涂料;防腐剂;
And I will always be inspired to do so by those people I encountered on Twitter, apparent enemies who became my beloved friends. 在推特上所遇到的人 总是启发着我这么做, 表面上看似敌对的人 却变成我心爱的朋友。
inspired:adj.受到启发的; v.鼓舞; (inspire的过去分词和过去式) apparent:adj.显然的;表面上的; beloved:adj.心爱的;挚爱的;n.心爱的人;亲爱的教友;
And in the case of one particularly understanding and generous guy, my husband. 有一位特别谅解又很宽大的人, 就是我的丈夫。
particularly:adv.特别地,独特地;详细地,具体地;明确地,细致地; generous:adj.慷慨的,大方的;宽宏大量的;有雅量的;
There was nothing special about the way I responded to him. 我回应他的方式一点都不特别。
responded:v.回答,回应;作出反应;响应;反应灵敏;(respond的过去式和过去分词)
What was special was their approach . 特别的是他们对待我的方法。
approach:n.方法;路径;v.接近;建议;着手处理;
I thought about it a lot over the past few years and I found four things they did differently that made real conversation possible. 过去几年我常常在想这件事, 我发现有四件事他们做得很不一样, 让真正的对话成为可能。
These four steps were small but powerful, and I do everything I can to employ them in difficult conversations today. 这四个步骤很小,但是很有力, 在现今棘手困难的对谈中, 我尽其所能地努力实践它们。
employ:vt.使用,采用;雇用;使忙于,使从事于;n.使用;雇用;
The first is don't assume bad intent . 第一就是不要假设对方的意图不好。
assume:v.承担;假定;采取;呈现; intent:n.意图;目的;含义;adj.专心的;急切的;坚决的;
My friends on Twitter realized that even when my words were aggressive and offensive , 我在推特上的朋友明白 即使我的词语激进、带着攻击性,
aggressive:adj.侵略性的;好斗的;有进取心的;有闯劲的; offensive:n.进攻;攻势;攻击;侵犯;adj.冒犯的;得罪人的;无礼的;
I sincerely believed I was doing the right thing. 我是真的相信我在做对的事。
sincerely:adv.真诚地;由衷地,诚恳地;
Assuming ill motives almost instantly cuts us off from truly understanding why someone does and believes as they do. 假设动机不良几乎立即切断机会 去了解他们为什么相信自己所为。
Assuming:conj.假设…为真; adj.傲慢的; v.假定; (assume的现在分词) motives:n.动机;目的;运动(motive的复数);v.使有动机;促动(motive的三单形式);
We forget that they're a human being with a lifetime of experience that shaped their mind, and we get stuck on that first wave of anger, and the conversation has a very hard time ever moving beyond it. 我们忘记了他们也是人, 他们一生的经历塑造了他们的想法, 而我们却卡在自己第一波的愤怒中, 使彼此的对话很难超过这种反应。
But when we assume good or neutral intent, we give our minds a much stronger framework for dialogue. 但是如果我们假设他们的意图良善或是中立, 我们的头脑就架构出 更适合对话的方式。
neutral:n.中立国; adj.中立的;
The second is ask questions. 第二是要问问题。
When we engage people across ideological divides, asking questions helps us map the disconnect between our differing points of view. 与意识形态相左的人交手时, 问问题会幫助我们 把两方的歧见连起来。
engage:v.吸引,占用;使参加;雇佣;使订婚;预定; ideological:adj.思想的;意识形态的; disconnect:vt.拆开,使分离;vi.断开;
That's important because we can't present effective arguments if we don't understand where the other side is actually coming from and because it gives them an opportunity to point out flaws in our positions. 这很重要,因为如果我们 不了解对方真正的来意, 我们就无法提出有效的论据; 而且这也让他们有机会指出 我们立场的缺陷之处。
effective:adj.有效的,起作用的;实际的,实在的;给人深刻印象;
But asking questions serves another purpose; it signals to someone that they're being heard. 但是问问题还有另一个目的: 它告诉对方我们在听。
When my friends on Twitter stopped accusing and started asking questions, 我在推特上的朋友停止控诉 并开始问问题后,
accusing:adj.谴责的;指责的;v.控告;控诉;谴责;(accuse的现在分词)
I almost automatically mirrored them. 我几乎自动模仿他们。
automatically:adv.自动地;机械地;无意识地;adj.不经思索的;
Their questions gave me room to speak, but they also gave me permission to ask them questions and to truly hear their responses . 他们的问题让我有空间说话, 但是他们也允许我对他们问问题, 也很认真地听他们的反应。
responses:n.回答,答复;反应;响应;(response的复数)
It fundamentally changed the dynamic of our conversation. 这从根本改变了我们对话的动态。
fundamentally:adv.从根本上;基础地;重要地 dynamic:n.动力; adj.充满活力的;
The third is stay calm. 第三是保持冷静。
This takes practice and patience , but it's powerful. 这要练习及耐心, 但这很有力。
patience:n.耐性,耐心;忍耐,容忍;
At Westboro, I learned not to care how my manner of speaking affected others. 在威斯特布路,我学会不去在乎 自己的言行对他人的影响。
I thought my rightness justified my rudeness — harsh tones , raised voices, insults , interruptions — but that strategy is ultimately counterproductive . 我想我的自以为义合理化了无礼── 尖刻的语气、提高的声量、 侮辱、插嘴 ── 但是这种策略最终适得其反。
rightness:n.公正;正直;廉正;贴切; justified:adj.正当的; v.证明…正确; (justify的过去式和过去分词) rudeness:n.无礼;粗蛮; tones:n.声调;基本音色(tone的复数);v.调节音调(tone的第三人称单数); insults:v.侮辱;辱骂(insult的第三人称单数);n.无礼;损害(insult的复数); interruptions:n.阻断物;中断时间;打扰;插嘴;(interruption的复数) strategy:n.策略;行动计划;部署;战略; ultimately:adv.最终;最后;归根结底;终究; counterproductive:adj.反生产的;使达不到预期目标的;
but we always refused to escalate . 但是我们总是拒绝升高战事。
escalate:vi.逐步增强;逐步升高;vt.使逐步上升;
Instead, he would change the subject. 他反而会改变话题。
He would tell a joke or recommend a book or gently excuse himself from the conversation. 他会说个笑话或推荐一本书, 或是很委婉的找个理由离开对话。
recommend:v.推荐;介绍;劝告;建议;使受欢迎; gently:adv.轻轻地;温柔地;温和地;
We knew the discussion wasn't over, just paused for a time to bring us back to an even keel . 我们知道讨论还没结束, 只是暂停一下,让我们回稳。
for a time:暂时;一段时期; keel:vt.给…装龙骨;把…翻转;n.龙骨;平底船;龙骨脊;vi.翻倒;倾覆;
People often lament that digital communication makes us less civil , but this is one advantage that online conversations have over in-person ones. 大家常常悲叹数位沟通 让我们变得不文明, 但是这也是网路对话 相较于面对面的好处之一,
lament:n.挽歌;恸哭;悲痛之情;vi.哀悼;悲叹;悔恨;vt.哀悼;痛惜; civil:adj.公民的;民间的;文职的;有礼貌的;根据民法的; advantage:n.有利条件:优势:优点: in-person:亲自;外貌上;
We have a buffer of time and space between us and the people whose ideas we find so frustrating . 当我们发现对方提出令我们沮丧的想法和观点时, 我们会有缓冲的时间与空间,
buffer:n.[计]缓冲区;缓冲器,[车辆]减震器;vt.缓冲; frustrating:adj.令人沮丧的;v.使沮丧;(frustrate的现在分词)
We can use that buffer. 我们可以运用那种缓冲。
Instead of lashing out, we can pause, breathe, change the subject or walk away, and then come back to it when we're ready. 与其破口大骂, 我们可以暂停、喘口气, 改变话题或离开, 然后在我们觉得准备好时回来。
lashing:n.大量,许多;鞭打;笞刑;v.猛击;鞭打;抽打;怒斥(lash的现在分词)
And finally ... 最后 ──
finally:adv.终于;最终;(用于列举)最后;彻底地;
make the argument. 还是要提出论证。
This might seem obvious , but one side effect of having strong beliefs is that we sometimes assume that the value of our position is or should be obvious and self-evident , that we shouldn't have to defend our positions because they're so clearly right and good 这听起来理所当然, 但是有强烈信念的副作用之一, 就是我们有时候假设 我们所持立场的价值观, 是或应该是显而易见、不言而喻, 我们不需要为自己的立场辩护, 因为它们是如此地正确与良善,
obvious:adj.明显的;显著的;平淡无奇的; side effect:n.副作用;附带后果; self-evident:adj.不言而喻的;不证自明的;
that if someone doesn't get it,it's their problem — that it's not my job to educate them. 如果有人不懂,那是他们的问题── 那不是我的职责去教育他们。
But if it were that simple, we would all see things the same way. 但是如果事情有那么简单, 我们早就用同样的方法看事情了。
As kind as my friends on Twitter were, if they hadn't actually made their arguments, it would've been so much harder for me to see the world in a different way. 就像我在推特上的益友一样, 如果他们没有真的提出论据, 对我而言用不同的眼光 看世界会更加困难。
We are all a product of our upbringing , and our beliefs reflect our experiences. 我们都是教养出来的产物, 我们的信念反映了自己的经历。
upbringing:n.教养;养育;抚育; reflect:v.反映;映出(影像);反射;表明,表达;
We can't expect others to spontaneously change their own minds. 我们不能期望别人能自动改变想法。
spontaneously:adv.自发地;自然地;不由自主地;
If we want change, we have to make the case for it. 如果我们想改变, 我们必须为之提出解释。
My friends on Twitter didn't abandon their beliefs or their principles — only their scorn. 我在推特上的朋友 没有放弃自己的信念或原则 ── 只有放弃他们的责难。
abandon:n.狂热;放任;v.遗弃;放弃; principles:n.原则;主义;本质;政策;(principle的复数)
They channeled their infinitely justifiable offense and came to me with pointed questions tempered with kindness and humor . 他们将自己极其正当的攻击, 化作带着好心及幽默的 尖锐问题来问我。
channeled:adj.有沟的;槽形的;v.引导;在…上开渠;输送;(channel的过去分词) infinitely:adv.无限地;极其; justifiable:adj.可辩解的,有道理的;可证明为正当的; offense:n.犯罪,过错;进攻;触怒;引起反感的事物; tempered:adj.缓和的,温和的;调节的;有…气质的;v.调和(temper的过去分词); humor:n.幽默;心情;情绪;脾气;v.迎合;迁就;
They approached me as a human being, and that was more transformative than two full decades of outrage, disdain and violence. 他们以人本的角度与我沟通, 这样的改变力量 比整整二十年的愤怒、鄙视和暴力更大。
approached:v.走近;临近;探讨;建议;(approach的过去分词和过去式) transformative:adj.变化的,变形的;有改革能力的; disdain:n.蔑视;vt.鄙弃;
I know that some might not have the time or the energy or the patience for extensive engagement , but as difficult as it can be, reaching out to someone we disagree with is an option that is available to all of us. 我知道有些人可能没有 时间或精力或耐心 更广泛地去参与, 但是无论多困难, 与持反对意见的人接触, 是我们所有人都能做的事。
extensive:adj.广泛的;大量的;广阔的; engagement:n.婚约;约会;交战;诺言;n.参与度; option:n.选择;可选择的东西;
And I sincerely believe that we can do hard things, not just for them but for us and our future. 我衷心相信我们能做困难的事, 不只是为了他们, 也为了我们及未来。
Escalating disgust and intractable conflict are not what we want for ourselves, or our country or our next generation. 加剧厌恶感及棘手的冲突 不是我们想要的, 也不是我们国家或下一代想要的。
Escalating:v.(使)逐步扩大,不断恶化,加剧;(escalate的现在分词) disgust:n.厌恶;反感;憎恶;v.使作呕;使厌恶;使反感; intractable:adj.棘手的;难治的;倔强的;不听话的; conflict:n.冲突;矛盾;争执;抵触;v.抵触;
My mom said something to me a few weeks before I left Westboro, when I was desperately hoping there was a way 在我离开威斯特布路的几星期前, 妈妈曾对我说过一些事, 当时我死命盼望
desperately:adv.拼命地;绝望地;不顾一切地;极度地;
I could stay with my family. 我还有办法能留在家里。
People I have loved with every pulse of my heart since even before I was that chubby-cheeked five-year-old, standing on a picket line holding a sign I couldn't read. 他们是我真心全意摯爱的家人, 在我是那个碧眼丰颊的五岁小孩, 拿着我还看不懂的牌子 站着示威前就如此了。
She said, "You're just a human being,my dear, sweet child." 她说:「妳只是个人,我可爱的乖孩子。」
She was asking me to be humble — not to question but to trust God and my elders. 她要我谦卑 ── 不要质问,只要相信神及长老就好。
humble:adj.谦逊的; vt.使谦恭;
But to me, she was missing the bigger picture — that we're all just human beings. 但是对我而言,她只是以管窥天── 她没看到我们全都只是人。
That we should be guided by that most basic fact, and approach one another with generosity and compassion. 她没看到我们应该 受那最基本的事实引导, 用慷慨和同情的态度接触彼此。
generosity:n.慷慨,大方;宽宏大量;
Each one of us contributes to the communities and the cultures and the societies that we make up. 我们每一个人都对我们构成的社区、 文化及社会有贡献。
contributes:[图情]投稿;[经]捐助;[经]捐献(contribute的第三人称单数);
The end of this spiral of rage and blame begins with one person who refuses to indulge these destructive, seductive impulses. 要终结这急遽上升的愤怒及责难, 要从某个人愿意 拒绝沉迷在这充满破坏性 却诱人的冲动开始。
spiral:n.螺旋;旋涡;螺旋形之物;adj.螺旋形的;v.使成螺旋形;vi.盘旋;螺旋形上升; indulge:v.沉湎,沉迷,沉溺(于…);放纵;听任;
We just have to decide that it's going to start with us. 我们只需要决定这要由自己做起。
Thank you. 谢谢！
(Applause) （掌声）