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MattTrombley_2020S-_求同的美好与复杂_-
So our story started several years ago, when my wife and I got a complaint letter in the mail from an anonymous neighbor. 我们的故事开始于几年前。 我和妻子在邮箱里发现了一封 来自一位匿名邻居的投诉信。
(Laughter) （笑声）
I'll never forget the way my wife transformed before my eyes from this graceful , peaceful, sweet woman into just an angry mother grizzly bear whose cubs needed to be protected. 我永远不会忘记当时 我妻子是如何在我眼前 从一位优雅、恬静、甜美的女人 化身成为保护幼崽的 愤怒的灰熊妈妈。
complaint:n.抱怨;投诉;控告;不满; anonymous:adj.匿名的,无名的;无个性特征的; transformed:v.使改变形态;使改变外观(或性质);(transform的过去分词和过去式) graceful:adj.优雅的;优美的; grizzly bear:n.[动]灰熊; cubs:n.(美)小熊; v.(野兽)生仔; adj.没经验的; (cub的复数)
It was intense . 当时的气氛非常紧张。
So here's what happened. 事情是这样的。
This is our family. 这是我们一家人的照片。
This is my wife and I and our five awesome kids. 我和妻子,还有五个可爱的孩子。
We're pretty loud, we're pretty rambunctious , we're us. 我们爱吵,我们爱闹, 这就是我们。[00:44]
intense:adj.强烈的;紧张的;非常的;热情的; awesome:adj.令人敬畏的;使人畏惧的;可怕的;极好的; rambunctious:adj.难控制的;喧闹的;粗暴的;骚乱的;
You'll notice, though, that two of our children look a little different than Mary and I, and that's because they came to us through adoption . 不过你们会发现, 其中的两个孩子 看起来跟我和玛丽有点不一样, 那是因为他们是我们领养的孩子。
Our neighbor, though, saw two different-looking children playing outside of our house every day and came to the conclusion that we must have been running an illegal day care out of our home. 然而我们的邻居每天都看到 这两个“与众不同”的孩子 在我们家外面玩耍。 他们因此认为 我们一定是在家里 开了一个非法的日托所。
different than:不同于; adoption:n.采用;收养;接受; conclusion:n.结论;结局;推论; illegal:adj.不合法的;非法的;n.非法移民;非法劳工;
(Murmuring) （低语声）
We were really angry to have our children stereotyped like that, but I know that's a relatively minor example of racial profiling . 我们的孩子被打上这样刻板的标签 让我们很生气, 但我知道这只是 “种族归纳”问题的冰山一角。
But isn't it sometimes what we all tend to do with people who think differently, or believe differently or maybe even vote differently? 但有时候,对待那些跟我们想法不同、 信仰不同,甚至投票意愿不同的人, 我们不也都有这么做的倾向吗？
Instead of engaging as true neighbors, we keep our distance and our actions towards those are guided by who we think sees the world as we do or who we think doesn't. 我们并未像真正的邻居那样相处, 而是与他们保持距离, 而我们对他们采取的行为 则取决于他们看待世界的方式 是否与我们相同。
stereotyped:adj.用铅版印刷的; v.把…浇铸成铅版; relatively:adv.相当程度上;相当地;相对地; minor:adj.未成年的; n.未成年人; vi.副修; racial profiling:n.种族形象定性(指警察等因肤色或种族而不是证据怀疑人犯罪); engaging:adj.有趣的; v.吸引住(注意力、兴趣); (engage的现在分词)
See, what my neighbor suffered from is a condition called agonism. 我的邻居患了某种被称作 “争胜主义”（Agonism）的症状。
And sometimes we all suffer from the same condition. 有时候,我们都会受到 同样症状的困扰。
It's not a medical condition, but it is contagious . 这不是一种医学疾病, 但却具有传染性。
So let's talk a little bit about what agonism is. 接下来让我们来聊一聊 什么是争胜主义。
My favorite definition of agonism is taking a warlike stance in contexts that are not literally war. 我最喜欢的 “争胜主义” 的定义是 “在非战争的情况下采取好战的姿态。” [ ——黛博拉·坦纳（Deborah Tannen） ]
contagious:adj.感染性的;会蔓延的; definition:n.定义;清晰度;(尤指词典里的词或短语的)释义;解释; warlike:adj.战争的;好战的;有战争危险的; stance:n.立场;姿态;位置;准备击球姿势; contexts:n.环境,[计]上下文(context复数); literally:adv.按字面:字面上:确实地:
Agonism comes from the same Greek root word " agon " “争胜主义（agonism）” 与 “痛苦（agony）” 这两个词
from which we get " agony ." 都源自同一个希腊词根 “agon”。
How very appropriate . 多么合适啊。
We all tend to show symptoms of agonism when we hold on to two deeply held beliefs, first identified by author Rick Warren . 当我们坚持两个根深蒂固的信念时, 彼此都容易表现出争胜的症状。 这个说法最早由作家 里克·沃伦（Rick Warren）提出。
agon:n.斗争;竞赛,有奖竞赛;戏剧中的人物冲突; agony:n.苦恼;极大的痛苦;临死的挣扎; appropriate:adj.适当的;恰当的;v.占用,拨出; symptoms:n.症状;征候;征兆;(symptom的复数) hold on to:坚持;紧握;克制; identified:v.确认;认出;找到;发现;说明身份;(identify的过去式和过去分词) Warren:n.养兔场;大杂院;拥挤的地区;
The first one is that if love someone, we must agree with all they do or believe. 第一个信念是,如果我们深爱一个人, 我们就必须赞成 他们所做的或所相信的一切。
And the second is the inverse , that if we disagree with someone, it must mean that we fear or we hate them. 而第二个信念则是相反的: 如果我们和一个人意见不同, 那必然意味着我们害怕或者憎恶对方。
Not sure we really recognize the agony this way of thinking brings to us, when our relationships die because we think we have to agree or disagree no matter what . 不知道我们是否真的意识到了 这种思维方式给我们带来的痛苦: 由于我们认为无论如何 都只能在同意与否之间两者择其一, 我们的人际关系必然就会走向破裂。
inverse:n.相反;倒转;adj.相反的;倒转的;v.使倒转;使颠倒; recognize:v.认识;认出;辨别出;承认;意识到; no matter what:不管什么…;
Think about the conversations we've had around Brexit , or Hong Kong, maybe Israeli settlements or perhaps impeachment . 回想一下我们围绕英国脱欧、 香港暴乱、 巴以冲突,或者弹劾案 进行过的对话。
I bet we could all think of at least one personal relationship that's been strained or maybe even ended because of these topics, or tragically , over a topic much more trivial than those. 我敢打赌,我们都能想到 至少一段私人关系 因这些话题而变得紧张, 甚至可能完全破裂。 或者更遗憾地, 因为更加微不足道的话题而决裂。
Brexit:英国退出欧盟; Israeli:adj.以色列的;以色列人的;n.以色列人; settlements:n.协议:处理:结算:定居点;(settlement的复数) impeachment:n.弹劾;控告;怀疑;指摘; bet:n.打赌;赌注;预计;估计;v.下赌注(于);用…打赌;敢说;八成儿; personal:adj.个人的;身体的;亲自的;n.人事消息栏;人称代名词; strained:adj.紧张的; v.使紧张(动词strain的过去式和过去分词); tragically:adv.悲剧地;悲惨地; trivial:adj.不重要的,琐碎的;琐细的;
The cure for agonism is not out of reach. 治愈争胜主义的方法并非遥不可及,
The question is how. 关键在于该怎么做。
So might I suggest two strategies that my experience has taught me to start with. 那么根据我的经验, 我建议从以下两点策略入手。
First, cultivate common ground , which means focusing on what we share. 首先,培养共同点, 也就是关注我们共有的东西。
I want you to know I'm using my words very, very deliberately . 我想让大家知道, 我的用词是非常谨慎的。
By "cultivate," I mean we have to intentionally work to find common ground with someone. 我说的 “培养” 是指我们要有意识地 去努力寻找与他人的共同点,
strategies:n.策略;行动计划;部署;战略;(strategy的复数) cultivate:vt.培养;陶冶;耕作; common ground:n.共同点; deliberately:adv.故意地;谨慎地;慎重地; intentionally:adv.故意地,有意地;
Just like a farmer works to cultivate the soil. 就像农夫努力耕地一样。
And common ground is a common term, so let me at least explain what I don't mean, which is I don't mean by common ground that we were exact, or that we totally agree and approve . 由于“共同点”是一个常见的词, 所以我要先解释一下我的意思, 我说的“共同点”并不是说 我们要完全相同, 或者完全赞同和认可对方。
All I mean is that we find one unifying thing that we can have in a relationship in common with another person. 而是说,我们发现了一件 可以让我们在与他人的关系中 找到共同点的事物。
You know, sometimes that one thing is hard to find. 有时候这一件东西是很难找到的。
approve:v.批准;赞成;同意;核准; unifying:使统一;(unify的现在分词)使成一体; in common with:与…一样;
So I'd like to share a personal story, but before I do, let me tell you a little bit more about myself. 所以我想跟大家分享 一个我自己的故事。 但在分享之前, 我想简单介绍一下自己。
I'm Caucasian , cisgender male, middle class , evangelical Christian. 我是高加索人（白种人）, 顺性男, 中产阶级,福音派基督徒。
And I know, as soon as some of those words came out of my mouth, some of you had some perceptions about me. 我知道,当我说出这些名词的时候, 你们中的一些人 就已经对我有了一些看法。
And it's OK, 没关系。
I know that not all those perceptions are positive . 我知道并非所有人的看法 都是正面的。
Caucasian:adj.高加索的;白种人的;n.白种人;高加索人; cisgender:个人的生理性别与其行为或其扮演的角色完全匹配; middle class:adj.中产阶级的;中层社会的; evangelical:adj.福音的;福音派教会的;新教会的;n.福音派信徒; as soon as:一…就; perceptions:n.认知;观念(perception的复数);理解; positive:adj.积极的;[数]正的,[医][化学]阳性的;确定的;n.正数;[摄]正片;
But for those who share my faith , know that I'm about to cut across the grain . 但我想告诉和我信仰相同的人, 接下来我说的将会违背常理。
And you may tune me out as well. 当然你们可以选择忽略。
So as we go, if you're having a hard time hearing me, 接下来, 如果你觉得很难理解我说的内容,
I just gently ask that you reflect and see if you're buying into agonism. 那么请稍微反思一下, 你是否相信 “争胜主义” 这个概念,
faith:n.信心;信任;宗教信仰; grain:n.粮食; v.把…作成细粒; tune:n.曲调;和谐;心情;v.调整;使一致;为…调音;调谐; gently:adv.轻轻地;温柔地;温和地; reflect:v.反映;映出(影像);反射;表明,表达;
If you're rejecting me simply because you think you see the world differently than I do, because isn't that what we're here talking about? 是否仅仅因为你与我 看待世界的角度不同, 这不就是我们现在 正在讨论的主题吗？
Alright, ready? 准备好了吗？
So I've been thinking a lot about how to find common ground in the area of gender fluidity , as an evangelical Christian. 我一直在思考 作为一名福音派基督徒, 如何在性别流动的领域中 找到共同点。
For Christians like me, we believe that God created us man and woman. 对于像我这样的基督徒而言, 我们相信,上帝把人类 创造成了男性和女性。
rejecting:v.拒绝接受;拒收;不录用;不出售,不出版;(reject的现在分词) fluidity:n.[流]流动性;流质;易变性;
So what do I do? 那么我该怎么做呢？
Do I throw up my hands and say, "I can't have a relationship with anybody who is transgender or LGBTQIA?" 我是不是要摊手说: “ 我不能和任何一个变性人 或者 LGBTQIA（性少数群体）扯上关系？”
No. 不。
That would be giving into agonism. 这么做就等于向争胜主义屈服了。
So I started looking at the foundational aspects of my faith, the first of which is that of the three billion genes that make us human -- and by the way , we share 99.9 percent of those genes -- that I believe those three billion genes are the result of an intelligent designer. 于是我开始审视 自己信仰中的基本理念, 首先是 造就我们人类的 30 亿个基因—— 顺便说一下,这些基因中的 99.9％ 是我们共通的—— 而我相信这 30 亿个基因 是某一位智能设计者的杰作。
transgender:n.跨性别;跨性别者; foundational:adj.基础的;基本的; aspects:n.方面;相位;面貌(aspect的复数); genes:n.基因;(gene的复数) by the way:顺便说一下; intelligent:adj.有才智的;悟性强的;聪明的;有智力的
And that immediately gives me common ground with anybody. 这个说法让我立刻 找到了和任何人的共同点。
What it also gives me ... 它也同样让我相信……
is the belief that each and every one of us have been given the right to life by that same intelligent designer. 我们每个人 都被同一个智能设计者 赋予了生命权。
I dug deeper though. 不过,我又深入思考了一下。
I found that my faith didn't teach me to start relationships by arguing with somebody until they believed what I believed, or I convinced them. 我发现,我的信仰并没有教我 在与他人开始相处时 要不断地争论, 直到他们相信我所相信的事情, 或者直到我说服了他们。
No, it taught me to start relationships by loving them as a coequal member of the human race . 相反,它教我与人相处时, 要作为平等的人类去爱他们。
Honestly though, some who share my faith draw a line and refuse to address somebody by their preferred gender pronoun . 不过老实说, 一些和我有同样信仰的人 会定下一条界线, 并且拒绝采用对方偏好的 性别代名词来称呼他们。
convinced:adj.坚信; v.使确信; (convince的过去分词和过去式) coequal:adj.(地位,能力等)互相平等的;n.(地位,能力等)互相平等的人; human race:n.人类; preferred:v.较喜欢;喜欢…多于…;(prefer的过去式和过去分词) pronoun:n.代词(代替名词或名词词组的单词);
But isn't that believing the lie that in order for me to honor you, 但这不就等于是相信了 “为了尊重你,
I have to give up what I believe? 我必须要放弃我的信仰” 这个谎言吗？
Come back in time with me -- let's say it's 20 years ago, and Muhammad Ali comes to your doorstep . 接下来让我们回到过去, 大概回到二十年前吧。 穆罕默德·阿里来到你的家门口,
And you open the door. 你打开了门。
Would you address him as Muhammad Ali or his former name of Cassius Clay ? 你会称呼他为 穆罕默德·阿里（Muhammad Ali）？ 还是他的曾用名 卡修斯·克莱（Cassius Clay）？
I'm guessing that most of you would say Muhammad Ali. 我猜大多数人都会 叫他穆罕默德·阿里。
doorstep:n.门阶; Cassius:n.卡西乌斯(罗马共和国末期的将领); Clay:n.黏土;陶土;
And I'm also guessing that most of you wouldn't think we'd have to immediately convert to Islam, just by using his name. 我猜大多数人也不会认为 只因叫了一声他的名字, 我们就要立马信奉伊斯兰教了吧？
To honor him would cost me, would cost any of us absolutely nothing, and it would give us the common ground to have a relationship. 尊重他并不会让你我 付出任何代价, 反而能让我们找到共同点, 来展开一段人际关系。
And it's the relationship that cures agonism, not giving up what we believe. 能够治愈争胜主义的 正是我们的关系, 而不是放弃我们的信仰。
convert:v.转换; n.改变宗教(或信仰、观点)的人; absolutely:adv.绝对地;完全地;
So for me to honor my faith, it means rejecting these rigid symptoms of agonism. 所以对我来说,尊重自己的信仰 就意味着要摈弃这些 争胜主义的死板症状。
Meaning, I can and I will love you. 也就是说,我能爱你,我也会爱你。
I can and I will accept you, and I don't have to buy into the lie that if I do these things, I have to give up what I believe or chose to fear and hate you. 我能接受你,我也会接受你。 我无需相信 “一旦我做了这些事情, 就必须放弃我的信仰”这样的谎言, 也不会选择害怕或憎恨你。
rigid:adj.严格的;僵硬的,死板的;坚硬的;精确的;
Because I'm focusing on what we have in common. 因为我专注于我们的共同点。
When you can find even the smallest bit of common ground with somebody, it allows you to understand just the beautiful wonder and complexity and majesty of the other person. 当你找到和他人的共同点时, 哪怕只有一点点, 这个共同点都会让你领会到 这个人的美好、 复杂 和威严。
Our second strategy gives us room to (Inhales) 第二个策略 给我们留出了（吸气）
breathe. 呼吸的空间。
To pause. 让我们停下脚步,
To calm down. 冷静下来,[08:13]
complexity:n.复杂性;难以理解的局势 majesty:n.威严;最高权威,王权;雄伟;权威; strategy:n.策略;行动计划;部署;战略;
To have the kind of relationships that cure agonism. 去建立能够治愈争胜主义的人际关系,
And how to keep those relationships alive. 并让这些关系保持鲜活。
Our second strategy is to exchange extravagant grace. 第二种策略是交换奢侈的恩典。
(Laughs) （笑声）
Once again, I'm not mincing words -- by grace, I don't mean we should all go sign up for ballet , that would be weird . 再强调一下,我并不是玩弄文字。 我说的恩典（优雅） 并不是指去报名芭蕾舞班, 那会显得很奇怪。
(Laughter) （笑声）
What I mean is not canceling everything over one mistake. 我的意思是, 不要因为一次错误就否定一切,[08:39]
exchange:n.交换;交流;交易所;兑换;v.交换;交易;兑换; extravagant:adj.奢侈的;浪费的;过度的;放纵的; mincing:adj.装腔作势的;矫饰的;v.切碎(mince的现在分词); ballet:n.芭蕾舞;芭蕾舞团;芭蕾舞剧; weird:adj.奇怪的;奇异的;离奇的;n.命运;宿命;命运女神;
Even if that mistake personally offended you. 即使那个错误冒犯到了你个人,
Maybe even deeply. 或许冒犯得很深。
Perhaps Holocaust survivor Corrie ten Boom put it best when she said, "To forgive is to set a prisoner free, only to realize that prisoner was me." 我认为二战大屠杀幸存者彭柯丽 （Corrie ten Boom）的形容最为贴切, 她说: “宽恕就是释放囚徒, 结果意识到那囚徒 不是别人,正是自己。”
personally:adv.个人;亲自;本人;就本人而言; offended:v.得罪;冒犯;犯罪;犯法;(offend的过去分词和过去式) Holocaust:n.大屠杀;毁灭; Corrie:n.山腰的洼地;冰斗; Boom:n.繁荣;吊杆;v.激增;繁荣昌盛;轰鸣;轰响;adj.(美)猛涨起来的; forgive:v.原谅;免除(债务,义务等);
My faith teaches me that we humans will never be perfect, myself very much included. 我的信仰告诉我, 人类永远不可能十全十美, 当然,我自己也包括在内。
So we need the grace of a savior , who for me is Jesus . 所以,我们需要救世主的恩典, 对于我来说,这个救世主就是耶稣。
And while I define grace in the context of my faith, 虽然我是根据我的信仰 来定义恩典的,
I know there's a lot of other people who have defined it differently and in different ways. 但是我知道还有很多人
One of my favorites is radio broadcaster Oswald Hoffmann, who said, "Grace is the love that loves the unlovely and the unlovable ." 我最喜欢的一个定义是电台主播 奥斯瓦尔德·霍夫曼（Oswald Hoffmann）所说的: “恩典就是去爱那些并不可爱的、 不受待见的人。”
savior:n.救世主;救星;救助者; Jesus:int.上帝啊:天哪:n.耶稣:耶稣基督: define:v.定义;使明确;规定; defined:adj.有定义的,确定的; v.使明确; broadcaster:n.广播公司;广播员;播送设备;撒播物; unlovely:adj.不好看的;不动人的;不美观的; unlovable:adj.不可爱的;
And I just love that picture of grace. 我非常喜欢这个恩典的定义方式。
Because I know I am, and maybe a lot of you can think of a time when we're just pretty dadgum unlovable. 因为我知道我是如此, 也许在座的各位 也能想到曾经有某一个时刻, 我们很不受人待见。
So it would be the height of hypocrisy , dare I say repulsive to my faith, for me to accept the unconditional , unqualified grace and love from God and then turn around and put one precondition on the love I give you. 所以,伪善的极致—— 我敢说我的信仰最厌弃的, 就是接受上帝无条件的、 然后回过头来, 为我给予你的爱 加上一个前提条件。
What in the world would I be thinking? 我到底在想什么？
And by extravagant, I mean over the top , not just checking a box. 我所说的 “奢侈”, 指的是做到极致, 而不是最低限度的敷衍。
We can all remember when we were kids and our parents forced us to apologize to somebody and we walked up to them and said, (Angrily) "I'm sorry." 我们都记得小时候, 父母会强迫我们向别人道歉。 这时我们会走到他们面前说 （生气地）:“对不起。”
hypocrisy:n.虚伪;伪善; repulsive:adj.排斥的;令人厌恶的;击退的;冷淡的; unconditional:adj.无条件的;绝对的;无限制的; unqualified:adj.不合格的;无资格的;不胜任的;不受限制的;无条件的;绝对的; precondition:n.前提;先决条件;vt.预处理;事先准备; over the top:adj.过多的;言过其实的;夸大其词的;
We just got it over with, right? 完全是草草了事,对吧？
That's not what we're talking about. 但我们所说的并不是这种情况。
What we're talking about is not having to give someone grace but choosing to and wanting to. 我们所说的不是 被迫给予某人恩典, 而是选择给予、想要给予。
That's how we exchange extravagant grace. 这就是我们交换奢侈恩典的方式。
Listen, I know this can sound really, really theoretical . 我知道这听起来非常的理论化,
So I'd like to tell you about a hero of mine. 所以我想给你们介绍一位 我心目中的英雄。
A hero of grace. 恩典的英雄。
It's 2014. 那是 2014 年,
In Iran. 事情发生在伊朗。[10:54]
theoretical:adj.理论的;理论上的;假设的;推理的;
And the mother of a murdered son is in a public square. 在公共广场上, 有一位谋杀受害者的母亲。
The man who murdered her son is also in that square, by a gallows , on a chair of some kind, a noose around his neck and a blindfold over his eyes. 而谋杀她儿子的那个人 也在那个广场上, 他在绞刑架边, 站在一把椅子上, 脖子上套着绞索, 眼睛上蒙着眼罩。
Samereh Alinejad had been given the sole right under the laws of her country to either pardon this man or initiate his execution . 萨米雷·阿琳贾德（Samereh Alinejad） 被祖国的法律 赋予了她独有的权利, 可以赦免此人, 也可以决定行刑。
Put another way, she could pardon him or literally push that chair out from underneath his feet. 换种说法就是,她可以原谅他, 也可以把他脚下的椅子推出去。
gallows:n.绞刑;绞刑架;承梁; noose:n.套索;束缚;绞刑;v.用套索捉;使落入圈套; blindfold:n.障眼物;眼罩;v.(用布等)蒙住…的眼睛;adj/adv.被蒙住眼睛的(地) sole:n.鞋底; adj.仅有的; v.给(鞋)换底; initiate:vt.开始,创始; n.开始; adj.新加入的; execution:n.执行,实行;完成;死刑; underneath:prep.在…的下面;在…的支配下;n.下面;底部;adj.下面的;底层的;
(Exhales) （呼气声）
I just ... 我真的……
I can't picture the agony going through both Samereh and this man at the time. 无法想象那一刻 萨米雷和这名男子所承受的痛苦。
Samereh with her choice to make, and this man, in the account that I read, was just weeping , just begging for forgiveness . 萨米雷必须要做出选择, 而这名男子,根据我读到的描述, 则是在哭泣, 乞求宽恕。
And Samereh had a choice. 而萨米雷有权做出选择。
And she chose in that moment to walk up to this man and to slap him right across the face. 那一刻,她选择走向这名男子, 扇了他一记响亮的耳光。
And that signaled her pardon. 这意味着她选择了宽恕。
It gets better. 更棒的是,[12:08]
weeping:adj.有下垂枝条的;v.哭泣,流泪;流出,渗出(液体);(weep的现在分词) forgiveness:n.宽恕;原谅;宽宏大量 slap:n.拍; v.拍; v.猛然; signaled:v.以动作向…示意;用信号发出,用信号通知;向…发信号(signal的过去分词);
Right afterwards, somebody asked her, they interviewed her, and she was quoted as saying, "I felt as if rage vanished from within my heart and the blood in my veins began to flow again." 紧接着有人问她, 她接受采访时说: “我感觉我心中的愤怒消失了, 我血管里的血液也再次开始流动了。”
Isn't that incredible ? 简直不可思议,不是吗？
I mean, what a picture of grace, what a hero of grace. 真是一个恩典的典范, 一位给予恩典的英雄。
And there's a lesson in there for all of us. 这给我们所有人都上了一课。
That as theologian John Piper said, "Grace is power, not just pardon." 这正如神学家约翰·派珀 （John Piper）所说的: “恩典不只是宽恕,而是一股力量。 ”[12:32]
interviewed:v.对(某人)进行面试(或面谈); (媒体)采访(interview的过去分词和过去式) quoted:v.引用;引述;举例说明;开价;(quote的过去分词和过去式) rage:n.狂怒;暴怒;(某情况引起的)愤怒;v.发怒;怒斥;猛烈地继续;激烈进行; vanished:v.消失了;突然消失;消亡;绝迹;(vanish的过去分词和过去式) veins:n.[解剖]静脉(vein的复数); v.使有脉络; incredible:adj.难以置信的,惊人的; theologian:n.神学者;空头理论家; Piper:n.吹笛者;风笛手;管道工;绿鳍鱼;气喘的马;
And if you think about it, grace is the gift we give someone else in a relationship that says our relationship is way more important than the things that separate us. 仔细想来, 恩典是我们在一段关系中 赠予别人的礼物, 它告诉我们,我们的关系远比 那些割裂我们的东西更为重要。
And if you really think about it some more, we all have the power to execute in our relationships, or to pardon. 如果你再细想一下, 在我们的关系中,其实我们每个人都有 处决或者宽恕的权利。
We never did find out the identity of our anonymous neighbor. 我们始终都没发现 我们匿名邻居的身份。
(Laughter) （笑声）
But if we did, I'd hope we'd simply say, "Can we have coffee?" 但如果我们知道, 我希望我们可以简单问一句, “能一起喝杯咖啡吗？”
And maybe there's somebody you need to have coffee with and find your common ground with them. 或许有这么一个人, 你需要和他一起喝杯咖啡 来找到你们之间的共同点。[13:18]
execute:vt.实行;执行;处死; identity:n.身份;同一性,一致;特性;恒等式;
Or maybe there's somebody you're in a relationship with and you need to exchange extravagant grace. 又或许你需要与某个正在交往的人 交换那奢侈的恩典。
Maybe go first. 也许你要选择主动。
These two strategies have taught me how to exchange extravagant grace in my relationships and to enjoy the beautiful design of my neighbors. 这两个策略教会了我 如何在人际关系中交换奢侈的恩典, 以及如何欣赏我邻居们的美好。
I want to continue to choose relationships over agonism. 我会继续选择与人共处, 而非坚持与人相争。
Will you choose to join me? 你愿意加入我吗？
Thank you. 谢谢。
(Applause) （掌声）