EmilyNagoski.2018-.不想要的性兴奋，真相为何？.；TED演讲稿

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EmilyNagoski_2018-_不想要的性兴奋，真相为何？_
[This talk contains mature content Viewer discretion is advised]	【本演说含有成人内容, 请观众自行斟酌考量。】
mature:v.成熟; adj.明白事理的; content:n.内容,目录;满足;容量;adj.满意的;vt.使满足; discretion:n.自由裁量权;谨慎;判断力;判定;考虑周到;
My specialty , as a sex educator, is I bring the science.	身为一名性教育者, 我的专长是引入科学。
specialty:n.专业,专长;特产;特性;招牌菜;adj.特色的;专门的;独立的;
But my first and most important job is that I stay neutral when I talk about anything sex-related, no embarrassment , no titillation , no judgment , no shame, no matter where I am.	但我最优先也最重要的工作, 是要保持中立的态度, 来谈任何和性相关的事情, 没有尴尬,没有挑逗, 没有评断,没有羞耻, 不论我在哪里。
neutral:n.中立国; adj.中立的; embarrassment:n.窘迫,难堪;使人为难的人或事物;拮据; titillation:n.搔痒;愉快; judgment:n.判断;裁判;判决书;辨别力;
No matter what question you ask me.	不论你问我什么问题。
No matter what:不管什么…;
At the end of a conference in a hotel lobby once,	有次,一场大会结束, 在饭店的大厅中,
conference:n.会议;研讨会;商讨会;体育协会(或联合会) lobby:n.大堂;门厅;民众接待厅;游说;v.游说(从政者或政府);
I'm literally on my way out the door and a colleague chases me down.	我正要走出门, 有一位同事追出来找我。
literally:adv.按字面:字面上:确实地: colleague:n.同事,同僚;
'"Emily, I just have a really quick question.	「艾蜜莉,让我快速问个问题就好。
A friend of mine --	我有一个朋友——
(Laughter)	（笑声）
wants to know if it's possible to get addicted to her vibrator ."	想要知道她有没有可能会对按摩器上瘾。」
addicted:adj.上瘾的;上瘾;成瘾;有瘾;入迷; vibrator:n.振动器;[电子]振子;振动按摩器;振动滚筒;簧片;
The answer is no, but it is possible to get spoiled .	答案是,不会, 但倒是有可能会被宠坏。
spoiled:v.破坏;搞坏;毁掉;溺爱;宠坏;善待;(spoil的过去分词和过去式)
A different conference, this one in an outdoor tropical paradise ,	还有另一场大会, 它是个户外的热带天堂,
outdoor:adj.户外的;露天的; tropical:adj.热带的;热情的;酷热的; paradise:n.天堂;至福境地;
I'm at the breakfast buffet , and a couple approaches me.	我在吃自助式早餐, 有一对夫妻来找我。
buffet:n.自助餐; vt.对…打来打去; adj.快餐式的 approaches:v.靠近,接近; n.方式,方法,态度;
'"Hi, Emily, we're sorry to interrupt you but we just wanted to ask a quick question about premature ejaculation ."	「嗨,艾蜜莉,很抱歉打扰您, 但我们想要快速问一个关于早泄的问题。」
interrupt:v.中断;打断;插嘴;妨碍;n.中断; premature:adj.早产的;不成熟的;比预期早的;n.早产儿;过早发生的事物; ejaculation:n.[生理]射精;突然说出;
'"Sure, let me tell you about the stop/start technique ."	「好啊,让我告诉你们阻止／开始早泄的技巧。」
technique:n.技巧,技术;手法;
That is my life.	这就是我的人生。
I stay neutral when other people might " squick ."	在其他人可能会「嫌恶」的情况下,我会保持中立。
squick:adj.过分了的;
Squick is an emotion that combines surprise with embarrassment plus some disgust and like, not knowing what to do with your hands.	嫌恶是一种情绪,它结合了惊讶、尴尬,还有一些厌恶感, 就像是不知道你的双手要做什么好。
emotion:n.强烈的感情;激情;情感; disgust:n.厌恶;反感;憎恶;v.使作呕;使厌恶;使反感;
So, it's a product.	所以,嫌恶是一种产物。
The reason you experience it is because you spent the first two decades of your life learning that sex is a dangerous and disgusting source of everlasting shame and if you're not really good at it, no one will ever love you.	你之所以会经历到它, 是因为在你人生中的前二十年中, 你学的都是:性是危险且恶心的, 会造成永久的羞耻, 还有如果你不擅长性, 就永远不会有人爱你。
disgusting:adj.令人不快的;令人厌恶的;v.使作呕;使厌恶;使反感;(disgust的现在分词) source:n.来源;水源;原始资料; everlasting:adj.永久的;永恒的;冗长的;n.永久;无穷;
(Laughter)	（笑声）
So you might squick, hearing me talk about sex while you're sitting in a room full of strangers -- that is normal.	所以,当你和一群陌生人同处在一个地方, 又听到我谈到性,你可能就会有嫌恶感—— 那很正常。
I invite you to breathe.	请各位呼吸。
Feelings are tunnels .	感觉是隧道。
tunnels:n.[交]隧道; v.凿隧道;
We make our way through the darkness to get to the light at the end.	我们穿过黑暗, 最后会在终点找到光。
And I promise it's worth it.	我保证是值得的。
Because I want to share with you today a piece of science that has changed how I think about everything, from the behavior of neurotransmitters in our emotional brain, to the dynamics of our interpersonal relationships.	因为今天我想要和各位分享一项科学, 它改变了我对一切的看法, 从我们情绪大脑中神经递质的行为, 到我们人际关系的动力。
neurotransmitters:n.神经传导物质(neurotransmitter的复数形式); emotional:adj.情绪的;易激动的;感动人的; dynamics:n.动力学,力学; interpersonal:adj.人际关系的;人际的;
To our judicial system.	到我们的司法体制。
judicial:adj.公正的,明断的;法庭的;审判上的;
And it starts with our brain.	它从我们的大脑开始。
There's an area of your brain you've probably heard referred to as the " reward center."	在大脑中有一个区域, 你们可能有听过, 叫做「酬偿中枢」。
referred:v.提到;引用;认为;指示;涉及;(refer的过去式和过去分词) reward:n.[劳经]报酬;报答;酬谢;v.[劳经]奖励;奖赏;
I think calling it the reward center is a little bit like calling your face your nose.	我想把它称为酬偿中枢, 就有点像是把你的脸叫做你的鼻子。
That is one prominent feature, but it ignores some other parts and will leave you really confused if you're trying to understand how faces work.	那是一个显着的特征没错, 但其他部分却被忽略了, 且若你想要了解脸部如何运作,就会觉得很混淆。
prominent:adj.突出的,显著的;杰出的;卓越的; ignores:v.忽视;对…不予理会;不予理睬;(ignore的第三人称单数) confused:adj.困惑的; v.使糊涂; (confuse的过去分词和过去式)
It's actually three intertwined but separable systems.	它其实是三个交织在一起但又各自独立的系统。
intertwined:adj.缠绕的;错综复杂的;v.使缠结,缠绕(intertwine的过去式); separable:adj.可分离的;可分隔的;
The first system is liking.	第一个系统是喜欢。
Which is like reward, so this is the opioid hotspots in your emotional brain.	它就像是酬偿, 所以这是你情绪大脑的鸦片热点。
opioid:n.[生化]阿片样物质;类鸦片; hotspots:n.热点(hotspot的复数);麻烦地点,热点地区;
It assesses hedonic impact -- "Does this stimulus feel good?	它会评估快乐的影响—— 「这种刺激的感觉好吗？
assesses:vt.评定;估价;对…征税; hedonic:adj.享乐的;享乐主义的; impact:n.影响;效果;碰撞;冲击力;v.挤入,压紧;撞击;对…产生影响; stimulus:n.刺激;激励;刺激物;
How good?	有多好？
Does this stimulus feel bad?	这种刺激的感觉糟吗？
How bad?"	有多糟？」
If you drop sugar water on the tongue of a newborn infant , the opioid-liking system sets off fireworks .	若你在新生儿的舌头上滴几滴糖水, 鸦片喜欢系统就会放烟火了。
newborn:adj.新生的;再生的;n.婴儿; infant:n.婴儿;幼儿;未成年人;adj.婴儿的;幼稚的;初期的;未成年的; fireworks:n.烟花;烟火表演;激烈的言辞;令人激动的行动;(firework的复数)
And then there's the wanting system.	下一个系统是想要。
Wanting is mediated by this vast dopaminergic network in and beyond the emotional brain.	「想要」是透过情绪大脑内外一个巨大的多巴胺网路来传递的。
mediated:vt.仲裁,调停;调解(mediate的过去式及过去分词形式); dopaminergic:adj.多巴胺能的;
It motivates us to move toward or away from a stimulus.	它能驱使我们朝刺激物前进或是远离它。
motivates:v.促使;刺激;给与动机(motivate的三单形式);
Wanting is more like your toddler , following you around, asking for another cookie.	「想要」就像是你的学步儿童,到处跟着你, 跟你再要一片饼干。
toddler:n.学步的小孩;幼童装;
So wanting and liking are related.	所以,想要和喜欢是有关联的。
They are not identical .	它们不完全相同。
identical:adj.同一的;完全相同的;n.完全相同的事物;
And the third system is learning.	第三个系统是学习。
Learning is Pavlov 's dogs.	学习是巴夫洛夫的狗。
Pavlov:n.巴甫洛夫(苏联生理学家和实验心理学家,全名为IvanPetrovich);
You remember Pavlov?	你们记得巴夫洛夫吗？
He makes dogs salivate in response to a bell.	他让狗在听到铃声时就会流口水。
salivate:v.垂涎,流口水; in response to:响应;回答;对…有反应;
It's easy, you give a dog food, salivates automatically , and you ring a bell .	这很容易,你把给狗食物, 牠自动会流口水, 同时你也摇铃。
salivates:v.(使)分泌(过多)唾液;(salivates是salivate的第三人称单数); automatically:adv.自动地;机械地;无意识地;adj.不经思索的; ring a bell:使某人想起某事,使人回忆起;
Food, salivate, bell.	食物,流口水,铃。
Food, bell, salivate.	食物,铃,流口水。
Bell, salivate.	铃,流口水。
Does that salivation mean that the dog wants to eat the bell?	流口水表示狗想要吃铃吗？
salivation:n.分泌唾液;流涎症;汞中毒;
Does it mean that the dog finds the bell delicious?	流口水表示狗觉得铃很可口吗？
No.	不是。
What Pavlov did was make the bell food-related .	巴夫洛夫所做的, 是让铃和食物具有相关性。
food-related:与食品相关的;
When we see this separateness of wanting, liking and learning, this is where we find an explanatory framework for understanding what researchers call arousal nonconcordance.	当我们能够把想要、喜欢、学习分开来看, 我们就能够找到解释性的架构, 用来了解研究者所谓的「性兴奋不一致」。
separateness:n.分离;单独;分开; explanatory:adj.解释的;说明的; arousal:n.觉醒;激励;
Nonconcordance, very simply, is when there is a lack of predictive relationship between your physiological response, like salivation, and your subjective experience of pleasure and desire.	不一致,简单来说, 就是没有预测关系存在于你的生理反应,比如流口水, 和你对于享乐及欲望的主观体验之间。
predictive:adj.预言性的;成为前兆的; physiological:adj.生理学的,生理的; subjective:adj.主观的;个人的;自觉的;
That happens in every emotional and motivational system that we have, including sex.	我们所有的情绪和动机系统都会发生这种状况, 包括:性。
motivational:adj.动机的;激发性的;有关动机的;动机说明;
Research over the last 30 years has found that genital blood flow can increase in response to sex-related stimuli even if those sex-related stimuli are not also associated with the subjective experience of wanting and liking.	过去三十年间的研究发现对于性相关的刺激, 人的反应是生殖器血流增加, 即使那些性相关的刺激并没有和想要及喜欢的主观体验有关联。
genital:adj.生殖的;生殖器的;n.生殖器;外阴部; stimuli:n.刺激;刺激物;促进因素(stimulus的复数); associated:adj.有关联的; v.联想; (associate的过去分词和过去式)
In fact, the predictive relationship between genital response and subjective experience is between 10 and 50 percent.	事实上,生殖器反应和主观体验之间的预测关系大约在 10% 到 50% 之间。
Which is an enormous range.	这个范围很大。
enormous:adj.庞大的,巨大的;凶暴的,极恶的;
You just can't predict necessarily how a person feels about that sex-related stimulus just by looking at their genital blood flow.	你就是无法肯定预测出一个人对于性相关刺激的感觉如何, 无法只透从他们的生殖器血流判断。
necessarily:adv.必要地;必定地,必然地;
When I explained this to my husband, he gave me the best possible example.	当我向我先生解释这一点时, 他给了我最好的例子。
He was like, "So, that could explain this one time, when I was in high school, I ...	他类似这样说: 「所以,这就能解释有一次我在高中的时候,我……
I got an erection in response to the phrase ' doughnut hole.'"	我对『油炸圈饼洞』这个词会有勃起反应。」
erection:n.勃起;建造;建筑物;直立; doughnut:n.油炸圈饼;圆环图;电子回旋加速器环状真空室;
(Laughter)	（笑声）
Did he want to have sex with the doughnut?	他想要和油炸圈饼性交吗？
No.	不。
He was a teenage boy flooded with testosterone , which makes everything a little bit sex-related.	他是个睪丸素丰富的青少年, 这就会让一切都和性有点关联。
testosterone:n.[生化]睾酮,睾丸素(男性荷尔蒙的一种);
And it can go in both directions.	且这可能是双向的。
A person with a penis may struggle to get an erection one evening, and then wake up the very next morning with an erection, when it's nothing but a hassle .	有老二的人可能会有天晚上突然遇到勃起困难, 隔天却一大早起床就勃起了, 那时勃起实在没用,只会造成麻烦。
penis:n.阴茎; hassle:n.困难;麻烦;分歧;争论;烦恼;v.(不断)烦扰,麻烦;
I got a phone call from a 30-something friend, a woman, she said, "So, my partner and I were in the middle of doing some things and I was like, 'I want you right now.'	有位三十多岁的女性朋友打电话给我, 她说:「我和我的另一半正在做一些事, 我说:『我现在就想要你。』
And he said, 'No, you're still dry, you're just being nice.'	他说:『不,你还是干的, 你只是在扮好人而已。』
And I was so ready.	我已经准备得非常好了。
So what's the matter, is it hormonal , should I talk to a doctor, what's going on?"	所以,怎么回事？是贺尔蒙？我要看医生吗？发生了什么事？」
hormonal:adj.荷尔蒙的,激素的;
Answer?	答案？
It's arousal nonconcordance.	那就是性兴奋不一致。
If you're experiencing unwanted pain, talk to a medical provider .	若你有感觉到不必要的痛苦, 去找医疗机构。
unwanted:adj.不需要的;有害的;讨厌的;空闲的; provider:n.供应者;养家者;
Otherwise -- arousal nonconcordance.	否则就是性兴奋不一致。
Your genital behavior just doesn't necessarily predict your subjective experience of liking and wanting.	你的生殖器行为不见得能预测出你对于「喜欢」和「想要」的主观体验。
Another friend, back in college, told me about her first experiences of power play in a sexual relationship.	在大学的时候,另一个朋友告诉我她在性关系中初次体验到权力游戏。
power play:n.以多打少(队员被罚下场造成一队的队员人数比另一队为多); sexual:adj.性的;性别的;有性的;
She told me that her partner tied her up with her arms over her head like this, she's standing up and he positions her so she's straddling a bar, presses up against her clitoris , like this.	她告诉我,她的另一半把她绑起来, 把她的手绑在头上,像这样, 她站立着,他调整好她的姿势, 她跨坐在杆子上,杆子向上抵着她的阴蒂,像这样。
straddling:v.骑;跨坐;跨过;横跨;两栖于(straddle的现在分词) clitoris:n.[解剖]阴蒂;阴核;
So there's my friend, standing there, and the guy leaves.	我的朋友站在那里, 那家伙就离开了。
It's a power play.	那就是权力游戏。
Leaves her alone.	她被单独留下。
So there's my friend, and she goes, "I'm bored ."	所以,我朋友在那里,她说: 「我好无聊。」
bored:adj.无聊的;厌倦的;烦闷的;v.使厌烦;钻,凿,挖;(bore的过去分词和过去式)
(Laughter)	（笑声）
And the guy comes back and she says, "I am bored."	那家伙回来了, 她说:「我好无聊。」
And he looks at her and he looks at the bar and he says, "Then why are you wet?"	他看着她,他看着那根杆子, 他说:「那你为什么没湿？」
Why was she wet?	为什么她会湿？
Is it sex-related to have pressure directly against your clitoris?	把压力直接加在你的阴蒂上, 是和性有关联的动作吗？
directly:adv.直接地;立即;马上;正好地;坦率地;conj.一…就;
Yeah.	是的。
Does that tell him whether she wants or likes what's happening?	那是否能幫他判断她是否想要或喜欢当时发生的事？
Nope.	不能。
What does tell him whether she wants or likes what's happening?	那要如何知道她是否想要或喜欢当时发生的事？
She does!	问她！
She recognized and articulated what she wanted and liked.	她知道且能清楚表达她想要和喜欢什么。
recognized:v.认识;认出;辨别出;承认;意识到;(recognize的过去分词和过去式) articulated:adj.铰接式的; v.铰接(articulate的过去分词);
All he had to do was listen to her words.	他只需要倾听她说的话即可。
My friend on the phone -- what's the solution ?	跟我通电话的朋友—— 解决方案是什么？
solution:n.解决方案;溶液;溶解;解答;
You tell your partner, "Listen to your words."	你告诉你的另一半: 「倾听你说的话。」
Also, buy some lube .	此外,买些润滑油。
lube:n.润滑油(等于lubrication);
(Laughter)	（笑声）
(Applause)	（掌声）
Applause for lube, absolutely .	为润滑油掌声,当然啦。
Applause:n.欢呼,喝采;鼓掌欢迎; absolutely:adv.绝对地;完全地;
(Applause)	（掌声）
Everyone, everywhere.	任何地方任何人都是如此。
But I want to tell you a darker listen-to-her-words story.	但我想告诉各位一个更黑暗的「倾听她的话」故事。
This one comes from a note that a student sent me after I gave a lecture about arousal nonconcordance.	这个故事来自一名学生写给我的字条, 这是在我教完关于性兴奋不一致的课之后。
lecture:n.演讲;讲座;讲课;谴责;v.开讲座;讲授;讲课;指责;告诫
She was with a partner, a new partner, glad to be doing things, and they reached a point where that was as far as she was interested in going and so she said no.	她和一个人在一起,刚开始交往, 很高兴能一起做些事, 他们的关系到了她已经不想要再进一步的程度, 所以她说「不」。
as far as:至于…;
And the partner said, "No, you're wet, you're so ready, don't be shy."	而另一半说:「不,你湿了, 那表示你准备好了,别害羞。」
Shy?	害羞？
As if it hadn't taken all the courage and confidence she had to say no to someone she liked.	说得好像她不需要用尽所有勇气和信心来拒绝她喜欢的人。
confidence:n.信心;信任;秘密;adj.(美)诈骗的;骗得信任的;
Whose feelings she did not want to hurt.	她并不想要伤害他的感受。
But she said it again.	但她又再说了一次。
She said no.	她说不。
Did he listen to her words?	他有倾听她说的话吗？
In the age of Me Too and Time's Up, people ask me, "How do I even know what my partner wants and likes?	在「我也是」和「时间到」的时代（反性骚扰运动）,我会被问到: 「我要如何知道我的另一半想要和喜欢什么？
Is all consent to be verbal and contractual now?"	现在所有的同意都是口头的、契约性质的吗？
consent:vi.同意;赞成;答应;n.同意;(意见等的)一致;赞成; verbal:adj.口头的;言语的;动词的;照字面的;n.动词的非谓语形式; contractual:adj.契约的,合同的;
There are times when consent is ambiguous and we need a large-scale cultural conversation about that.	有些时候,同意是很模糊的, 我们需要对此进行大规模的文化对谈。
ambiguous:adj.模糊不清的;引起歧义的; large-scale:adj.大规模的,大范围的;大比例尺的; cultural:adj.与文化有关的;文化的;与艺术、文学、音乐等有关的;
But can we make sure we're noticing how clear consent is if we eliminate this myth ?	但我们是否能确定, 如果我们消除了这项迷思, 就能注意到同意有多清楚？
eliminate:v.消除;排除; myth:n.神话;虚构的人,虚构的事;
In every example I've described so far, one partner recognized and articulated what they wanted and liked: "I want you right now."	在我目前所描述的每个例子中, 其中一半知道且明确表达他们想要和喜欢什么: 「我现在就想要你。」
described:v.描述;形容;把…称为;做…运动;(describe的过去分词和过去式)
'"No."	「不。」
And their partner told them they were wrong.	而他们的另一半告诉他们:他们错了。
It's gaslighting .	这是点煤灯。
gaslighting:煤气灯照明的;
Profound and degrading .	很深奥且把人降格。
Profound:adj.深厚的;意义深远的;渊博的; degrading:adj.降低身份的; v.降低…身份; (degrade的现在分词)
You say you feel one way, but your body proves that you feel something else.	你说你的感觉是这样, 但你的身体却证明你的感觉不是那样的。
And we only do this around sexuality , because arousal nonconcordance happens with every emotional and motivational system we have.	我们只有在扯到性行为时才这么做, 因为性兴奋不一致的发生和我们所有的情绪和动机系统都有关。
sexuality:n.[胚]性别;性欲;性征;性方面的事情(比如性行为或性能力);
If my mouth waters when I bite into a wormy apple, does anybody say to me, "You said no, but your body said yes?"	如果当我咬下有虫的苹果时, 我的嘴巴流口水了, 会不会有人对我说: 「你说不要,但你的身体说要？」
wormy:adj.有虫的,虫蛀的;似虫的;卑躬屈膝的;
(Laughter)	（笑声）
And it's not only our partners who get it wrong.	且不只是我们的另一半会误解。
The National Judicial Education Program published a document called "Judges Tell: What I Wish I Had Known Before I Presided in a Case of an Adult Victim of Sexual Assault ."	国家司法教育计画出版了一份文件, 题名为「法官判定:我希望在我接管一个成人受害者遭受性侵害案件之前就能知道的事」。
Presided:v.主持(preside的过去式); Victim:n.受害人;牺牲品;牺牲者; Sexual Assault:性侵犯;性暴行;
Number 13:	第 13 条例:
On occasion , the victim, female or male, may experience a physical response, but this is not a sexual response in the sense of desire or mutuality ."	「偶尔,受害者,不论男女, 有可能会发生身体反应, 但这并不是出于欲望或是相互关系的性反应。」
On occasion:有时;偶尔; female:adj.女性的;雌性的;柔弱的,柔和的;n.女人;[动]雌性动物; physical:adj.[物]物理的;身体的;物质的;符合自然法则的;n.体格检查; mutuality:n.相关;(相互)依存;同感;亲密;
This brings me one step closer into the darkness, and then I promise we will find our way into the light.	这就让我向黑暗又再靠近了一步, 接着,我保证我们会找到通往光明的路。
I'm thinking of a recent court case involving multiple instances of non-consensual sexual contact .	我在想最近的一个法庭案件, 是关于多次发生未受到同意的性接触。
involving:v.包含;需要;牵涉;牵连;影响;(使)参加;(involve的现在分词) multiple:adj.数量多的;多种多样的;n.倍数; instances:n.相依物体,例子; v.举例说明(instance的第三人称单数形式); contact:n.接触,联系;v.使接触,联系;
Imagine you're on the jury and you learn that the victim had orgasms .	想像你是陪审团, 你得知受害者有高潮。
jury:n.[法]陪审团;评判委员会;adj.应急的; orgasms:n.[生理]性高潮;极度兴奋;v.达到性高潮;(orgasm的第三人称单数和复数)
Does it change how your gut responds to the case?	那是否会改变你对于这个案件的本能反应？
gut:n.勇气;肠道;内脏;v.损毁内部;取出…的内脏;adj.非理性的;本能的 responds:v.(口头或书面)回答,回应;作出反应;响应;(respond的第三人称单数)
Let me remind you, orgasm is physiological; it is a spontaneous , involuntary release of tension , generated in response to sex-related stimuli.	让我提醒各位,高潮是生理的; 它是一种自发性、非自愿性的压力释放, 会因为性相关的刺激而产生。
remind:v.提醒;使想起; spontaneous:adj.自发的;自然的;无意识的; involuntary:adj.无意识的;自然而然的;不知不觉的; release:v.释放;发射;让与;允许发表;n.释放;发布;让与; tension:n.张力;拉伸;矛盾;紧张局势(或关系,状况);v.绷紧; generated:v.产生;引起;(generate的过去式和过去分词)
But the perpetrator’s lawyer made sure the jury knew about those orgasms because he thought the orgasms could be construed as consent.	但行兇者的律师确保陪审团知道这些高潮的发生, 因为他认为高潮可以被推断为同意。
construed:v.理解;领会;(construe的过去式和过去分词)
I will also add that this was a child being abused by an adult in the family.	我还要补充一点,这个案件是孩童被家庭中的成人给虐待。
abused:v.滥用(以致危害健康); (abuse的过去分词和过去式)
I invite you to breathe.	我想请各位呼吸。
That kind of story can give a person all kind of feelings, from rage to shame to confused arousal because it is sex-related, even though it is appalling .	那种故事可能会给人各种感受, 从愤怒,到羞耻, 到让人困惑的性兴奋, 因为它和性有关, 即便它是很骇人的事件。
rage:n.狂怒;暴怒;(某情况引起的)愤怒;v.发怒;怒斥;猛烈地继续;激烈进行; appalling:adj.可怕的;令人震惊的;v.使惊愕;惊吓;(appal的现在分词)
But even though I know it's difficult to sit with those feelings in a room full of strangers, if we can find our way through all of the messy feelings,	但即使我知道, 在一个都是陌生人的房间中, 那些感觉会让人坐立难安, 如果我们能找到一条路穿过所有这些混乱的感受,
messy:adj.肮脏的;凌乱的;不整洁的;
I believe we will find our way to the light of compassion for that child, whose relationship with her body was damaged by an adult whose job it was to protect it.	我相信我们能找到通往光的路, 同情那个孩子, 她和她身体之间的关系受到了损害, 兇手正是应该要保护它的成人。
compassion:n.同情;怜悯;
And we'll find hope that there was a trustworthy adult who could say, "Genital response just means it was a sex-related stimulus; doesn't mean it was wanted or liked, certainly doesn't mean it was consented to.	我们会找到希望, 希望能有个值得相信的成人, 能跳出来说:「生殖器反应只意味着这是和性相关的刺激; 并不表示被害人想要或喜欢它, 肯定也不表示被害人同意。」
trustworthy:adj.可靠的;可信赖的; consented:vi.同意;赞成;答应;n.同意;(意见等的)一致;赞成;
(Applause)	（掌声）
That compassion and that hope are why I travel all over, talking about this to anyone who will listen.	那种同情及那种希望, 就是为什么我会四处旅行跟任何愿意倾听的人谈论这个议题。
I can see it helping people, even as I say the words.	我可以看到它能协助人, 即便我只是说出来,
I invite you to say the words.	我想请各位说出来。
You don't have to say "clitoris" in front of 1000 strangers.	你们不需要在一千个陌生人面前说「阴蒂」。
But do have one brave conversation.	但请务必要做勇敢的对谈。
Tell this to someone you know who has experienced sexual violence -- you definitely know someone.	把这项资讯告诉你所认识经历过性暴力的人—— 你一定认识这样的人。
violence:n.暴力;侵犯;激烈;歪曲; definitely:adv.清楚地,当然;明确地,肯定地;
In the US it's one in three women.	在美国,三个女人中就有一个。
One in six men.	六个男人中就有一个。
Almost half of transgender folks.	变性人则是近半。
transgender:n.跨性别;跨性别者;
Say "Genital response means it's a sex-related stimulus.	说「生殖器反应意味着这是和性相关的刺激。
It doesn't mean it was wanted or liked."	并不表示当事人想要或喜欢它。」
Say it to a judge you know or a lawyer you know, or a cop or anyone who might sit on a jury in a sexual assault case.	把这资讯告诉你认识的法官或律师, 或警察,或有可能会在性侵案件中坐在陪审团席上的任何人。
cop:v.遭受;忍受;注意到;n.警察;
Say "Some people think that your body doesn't respond if you don't want or like what's happening, if only that were true.	说:「有些人认为, 若你不想要或不喜欢正在发生的事情, 你的身体就不会有反应, 但愿那是真的。
only that:只是;要不是;
Instead, arousal nonconcordance.	其实,是性兴奋不一致。
Say this to the confused teenager in your life who is just trying to figure out what, even, what?	把这项资讯告诉你生活中感到困惑的青少年少女, 他们都还在试图搞清楚状况。
Say, if you bite this moldy fruit and your mouth waters, nobody would say to you, "Well, you just don't want to admit how much you like it."	如果你咬下这发霉的水果, 而你的嘴巴流口水了, 没有人会对你说: 「嗯,你只是不想要承认你有多喜欢它。」
moldy:adj.发霉的;乏味的;陈腐的;
Same goes for down below, arousal nonconcordance.	下体也是一样的,性兴奋不一致。
Say it to your partner.	把它告诉你的另一半。
My genitals do not tell you what I want or like.	我的生殖器不会告诉你我想要或喜欢什么。
genitals:n.生殖器;外阴部;
I do.	我才会告诉你。
(Applause)	（掌声）
The roots of this myth are deep and they are entangled with some very dark forces in our culture.	这项迷思的根源很深, 且与我们文化中一些非常黑暗的力量纠结在一起。
entangled:adj.卷入的;被缠住的;v.卷入;使…混乱;使…纠缠;
But with every brave conversation we have, we make the world that little bit better, a little simpler for the confused teenager.	但每当我们能进行勇敢的对谈, 我们就能为困惑的青少年男女,把世界变得更好一点,更简单一点。
A little easier for your friend on the phone, worried that she's broken.	让你那位打电话给你, 担心自己心碎的朋友,能好过一点。
A little easier and safer for the survivors, one in three women.	也能让生存者更好过、更安全一点, 那是三个女人中就有一个。
One in six men.	六个男人中就有一个。
Half of trans folks.	变性人中一半的人。
Me too.	我也是。
So for every brave conversation you have, thank you.	所以,对于你所进行的每一次勇敢对谈, 我谢谢你。
(Applause)	（掌声）
Thank you.	谢谢大家。
Thanks.	谢谢。
(Applause)	（掌声）
Helen Walters: Emily, come up here.	海伦 · 华特斯:艾蜜莉,请上来。
Thank you so much.	非常谢谢你。
I know that you do this all the time, and yet, still, I'm so grateful to you for having the courage to come and talk about that on this stage.	我知道你常在做这类演说, 但我仍然很感激你能有勇气来这里上台,并谈论那个主题。
It really took a lot and we're very grateful to you.	那真的很了不起,我们很感谢你。
So thank you.	所以,谢谢你。
Emily Nagoski: I am grateful to be here.	艾蜜莉 · 纳高斯基: 我很榮幸来这里。
HW: So in your regular day job,	海:在你平常白天的工作中,
I imagine, as you put at the top of the talk, you get asked a lot of questions.	如同你在这场演说一开头说的, 我想像你会被问到很多问题。
But what's the one question that you get asked all the time that you can share with everyone here so you don't have to answer it 1000 times throughout the rest of the week?	但哪个问题是你总是会被问到的？你可以在这里和大家分享, 你就不用在接下来的一周再回答一千次。
throughout:adv.自始至终,到处;全部;prep.贯穿,遍及;
EN: The question I get asked most often is actually the question underneath pretty much all the other questions, so, can you get addicted to your vibrator, please help me with my erectile dysfunction ?	艾:我最常被问的问题其实是几乎所有其他问题背后的问题, 你有可能对按摩器上瘾吗？我有勃起功能障碍,请幫幫我？
underneath:prep.在…的下面;在…的支配下;n.下面;底部;adj.下面的;底层的; erectile:adj.勃起的;[昆]可使直立的; dysfunction:n.功能紊乱;机能障碍;官能不良;vi.功能失调;出现机能障碍;垮掉;
Underneath every question is actually the question, "Am I normal?"	在每个问题的背后,其实都是一个问题:「我正常吗？」
To which my answer in my mind is, what even is normal and why is that what you want your sexuality to be?	对这个问题,我心中的答案是, 正常是什么？你为什么会希望你的性是正常的？
Why do we only want to be normal around sexuality?	为什么在性方面我们只想要正常？
Don't we want to be extraordinary ?	我们不想要不凡吗？
extraordinary:adj.非凡的;特别的;离奇的;临时的;特派的;
Like, do you just want normal sex or do you want awesome sex in your life?	比如,你的人生中只想要正常的性爱？还是很棒的性爱？
awesome:adj.令人敬畏的;使人畏惧的;可怕的;极好的;
I think, though, there's a lot of fear around being too different sexually .	不过,我想,在性方面, 太与众不同会带来恐惧。
sexually:adv.性,性欲
When people are asking me, "Is this thing I'm experiencing normal,"	当有人问我: 「我经历的这个状况正常吗？」
what they're actually asking me is, "Do I belong?"	他们其实是在问我: 「我属于哪儿吗？」
Do I belong in this relationship, do I belong in this community of people, do I belong on earth as a sexual person?	我属于这段关系吗？我属于这个人类社群吗？就性方面,我属于地球吗？
community:n.社区;[生态]群落;共同体;团体;
To which the answer is always a resounding yes.	这些问题的答案永远都是响亮的「是」。
resounding:adj.巨大的; v.回响; (resound的现在分词)
The only barrier there is, the only limit there is, there are two: one, if you're experiencing unwanted sexual pain, talk to a medical provider.	只有两项障碍或是限制: 第一,如果你感受到不想要的性痛苦, 去找医疗机构谈谈。
barrier:n.屏障;障碍;障碍物;关口;v.用栅围住;
And two: As along as everybody involved is free and glad to be there, and free to leave whenever they want to, you're allowed to do anything that you want to.	第二:只要相关涉入的人都很自由且高兴能在场, 且想要离开的时候就能离开, 你就可以做任何你想要做的事。
involved:adj.有关的; v.涉及; (involve的过去式和过去分词)
There is no script , there is no box you have to fit into, you're allowed, as long as there is consent and no unwanted pain, you're totally free to do whatever you want.	没有脚本,没有你需要配合的标准, 只要有同意,没有不想要的痛苦, 你就可以完全自由地去做你想要做的。
script:n.剧本;电影剧本;笔迹;广播(或讲话等)稿;v.为电影(或戏剧等)写剧本; as long as:conj.只要;长达;如果;既然;
HW: Amazing. Thank you so much.	海:很棒。非常谢谢你。
EN: Thank you.	艾:谢谢你。
HW: Thank you, you're incredible .	海:谢谢你,你棒极了。
incredible:adj.难以置信的,惊人的;
(Applause)	（掌声）

EmilyNagoski_2018-_不想要的性兴奋，真相为何？_