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AmyBakerWWW_2018V-_办公室恋情的7个常见问题_
Workplace romance can be a tricky topic. 办公室恋情是个棘手话题。
Workplace:n.工作场所;车间; romance:n.爱情;恋爱;风流韵事;传奇故事; tricky:adj.难办的;难对付的;狡猾的;诡计多端的;
(Music) （音乐）
[The Way We Work] [我们的工作方式]
How do we manage the boundaries between our personal and professional lives? 我们如何管理我们的 个人和职业生活的界限？
boundaries:n.边界;分界线;(boundary的复数) personal:adj.个人的;身体的;亲自的;n.人事消息栏;人称代名词; professional:adj.专业的;职业的;职业性的;n.专业人员;职业运动员;
How do we deal with gender imbalances and power dynamics in the workplace? 我们如何处理职场中 的性别失衡和权力动态？
gender:n.性别; imbalances:n.不平衡;不安定; dynamics:n.动力学,力学;
There's a lot of gray area in workplace romance. 职场恋情有很多灰色地带。
I'd like to take a few minutes and answer some of your frequently asked questions. 我想花几分钟 回答你们经常问到的问题。
frequently:adv.频繁地,经常地;时常,屡次;
So, question one: Should I date my coworker ? 所以,问题1:我应该和同事约会吗？
coworker:n.同事;合作者;
Uh ... it depends. 呃…这得看情况。
Do you want to date your coworker for a bit of fun? 你和同事约会是想找乐子吗？
Do you want to date your coworker to hook up? 你和同事约会是为了勾搭吗？
hook:n.钩;挂钩;鱼钩;钓钩;v.挂住;箍住;钓(鱼);打曲线球;
Because then you're really better off on Tinder . 因为那样的话你在Tinder上的效果会更好。
Tinder:n.火绒;易燃物;
If you want to date your coworker because you really, sincerely think you're falling in love with them or there's a real potential for a long-term , committed relationship, maybe you should date your coworker. 如果你想和同事约会 是因为你真是,真诚地认为你堕入爱河了, 或者有发展一段真正的, 长期的,承诺的感情潜力, 也许你应该和你的同事约会。
sincerely:adv.真诚地;由衷地,诚恳地; potential:n.潜能;可能性;[电]电势;adj.潜在的;可能的;势的; long-term:adj.长期的;从长远来看; committed:adj.坚信的; v.做出错事; (commit的过去分词和过去式)
Studies show that your coworkers are generally positive about it if they perceive that you're falling in love and genuinely care about each other. 研究表明,你的同事通常对此非常积极, 如果他们感到你陷入爱河 并真正关心彼此。
coworkers:n.同事;合作人;(coworker的复数形式) generally:adv.通常;普遍地,一般地; positive:adj.积极的;[数]正的,[医][化学]阳性的;确定的;n.正数;[摄]正片; perceive:v.注意到;意识到;将…理解为;认为; genuinely:adv.真诚地;诚实地;
It's when your coworkers sense that something else is in play -- that can be disruptive . 当你的同事意识到有其他因素时—— 这可能是破坏性的。
disruptive:adj.破坏的;分裂性的;制造混乱的;
Question two: 问题2:
Should I date my boss? 我应该和老板约会吗？
In almost all cases, no, you should not date your boss, because now, you've got a power dynamic. 在几乎所有的场合,不要, 你不应该和你老板约会, 因为现在,你会面临一场权力动态。
When there's a relationship between a boss and a subordinate , it generates a lot of negative feelings, and the negative feelings tend to fall on the person who's lower on the totem pole . 当老板和下属有关系的时候, 它会产生很多负面情绪, 负面情绪倾向于落在 地位较低的人身上。
subordinate:n.下属,下级;部属,属下;adj.从属的;次要的;vt.使…居下位;使…服从; generates:[计]生成;发生; negative:adj.[数]负的;消极的;否定的;阴性的;n.否定;负数;[摄]底片;v.否定;拒绝; totem pole:n.图腾柱;推拉输出电路;
People usually assume some kind of favoritism , some kind of inside knowledge, and there can be resentment stirred up by that. 人们通常会认为存在偏袒, 内部知识, 这可能会激起怨恨。
assume:v.承担;假定;采取;呈现; favoritism:n.偏袒;得宠; resentment:n.愤恨,怨恨; stirred:v.搅动;搅和;搅拌;(使)微动;(stir的过去分词和过去式)
There was a study published last year that suggested dating a superior can even have a negative impact on your career . 去年发布的研究显示 和高层约会甚至会对你的 职业生涯造成负面影响。
superior:n.上级;上司;adj.(在品质上)更好的;占优势的;更胜一筹的; impact:n.影响;效果;碰撞;冲击力;v.挤入,压紧;撞击;对…产生影响; career:n.职业;事业;生涯;经历;
The researchers asked third-party evaluators online to imagine that they worked at a law firm. 研究人员在线询问第三方评估者 去想象一下他们在律师事务所工作。
third-party:adj.第三方,第三方的;
They asked them to make recommendations on which employee should get picked for a special training program and which should get promoted to partner. 他们让他们推荐哪个员工应该挑选来 参加特殊培训项目 以及哪个员工应该晋升为合伙人。
recommendations:n.推荐;推荐信;推荐规范(recommendation的复数形式); promoted:v.促进:促销:提升:(promote的过去分词和过去式)
They looked at credentials for imaginary employees, and when it was stated that an employee had been dating or was in a relationship with a superior, the evaluators were less likely to pick that person for the training program or the promotion, even if they had the exact same credentials as someone who wasn't dating their boss. 他们研究了虚构员工的证书, 当被告知有员工与更高层正在约会 或者有过一段感情经历时, 评估者更不可能挑选这个人参与培训项目 或者晋升, 即便她们拥有和那些 没有和老板约会的人同样的资历。
credentials:n.[管理]证书; v.得到信用; imaginary:adj.虚构的,假想的;想像的;虚数的;
The evaluators were also quick to dismiss their accomplishments . 评估者很快否定了她们的成就。
dismiss:v.不予考虑;摒弃;消除;解雇; accomplishments:n.成就;成绩;才艺;技艺;完成;(accomplishment的复数)
Question three: 问题3:
Can I date someone who reports to me? 我可以和向我汇报的人约会吗？
Still a big no. 仍然不能。
You may not feel like you're really the boss, right? 你可能会感到你不是真正的老板,对吧？
But you are, and there's a power dynamic there that's simply not there for other couples. 但你是老板,这里存在权力动态, 这是其他夫妻所没有的。
If you really believe there is a sincere, honestly felt, personal connection that would be lasting and meaningful , one of you may need to move, and it shouldn't always be the person who's lower in the company pecking order. 如果你真的相信这是个真诚的、发自内心的、 有意义的人际关系, 你们其中有个人需要换地方, 而且也不应该总是公司里 地位较低的人说了算。
meaningful:adj.严肃的;重要的;重大的;意味深长的; pecking:v.啄;鹐;匆匆地轻吻;(peck的现在分词)
Question four: 问题4:
I've just started seeing a coworker. 我刚刚开始和一个同事约会。
How do we handle things? 我们应该如何处理这些事情？
handle:n.[建]把手;柄;手感;口实;v.处理;操作;运用;买卖;触摸;
I get this question a lot. 我常常被问这个问题。
'"Are they dating? Are they not dating?" “他们在约会吗？他们没有约会？”
Don't keep it a secret. 不要保密。
You don't have to make a big deal of it, but secrecy tends to be corrosive . 你不必大惊小怪,但保密往往是有害的。
a big deal:na.要人;重要的事; secrecy:n.保密;秘密;隐蔽; corrosive:adj.腐蚀的;侵蚀性的;n.腐蚀物;
People tend to see workplace couples as a coalition or a unit, so try to make it clear to your coworkers that you're not the same person; you love each other, but you are going to disagree. 人们往往把职场夫妻视为 一个联盟或一个团体, 所以试着让你的同事明白 你不是那样的人; 你们彼此相爱,但你们会有分歧。
coalition:n.联合;结合,合并;
Question five: 问题5:
Why are coworkers often attracted to each other? 为什么同事之间经常相互吸引？
Well, the obvious answer is people tend to be attracted to each other the more time they spend together. 一个明显的答案是 通常人们接触的时间越久 越容易相互吸引。
obvious:adj.明显的;显著的;平淡无奇的;
But there's another ingredient that has to be added: attraction tends to happen when there's work that demands close collaboration . 但还有另一种成分需要加入: 当工作需要密切合作时, 吸引力就会产生。
ingredient:n.原料;要素;组成部分;adj.构成组成部分的; collaboration:n.合作;勾结;通敌;
So imagine you have a big group project with a tight deadline and you're working late nights and brainstorming ideas. 所以去想象你有一个大 团队项目,时间很紧, 你工作到深夜还在头脑风暴。
deadline:n.最后期限;截止日期; brainstorming:n.集思广益;v.集中各人智慧猛攻;(brainstorm的现在分词)
You look up, and across the table, one of your colleagues throws out a really great idea. 你抬起头,隔着桌子, 其中一个同事抛出了个很棒的点子。
colleagues:n.同事;同行(colleague的复数);
You may feel something, and that's natural. 你可能会有所感觉,这很正常。
We call this task interdependence . 我们称之为相互依存。
interdependence:n.互相依赖;
It's a ripe ground for attraction. 这是吸引力的成熟土壤。
ripe:adj.成熟的;口味浓郁的;醇美可口的;强烈的;
The second reason why people at work are attracted to each other is they may often be similar to each other. 人们在工作中相互吸引的第二个原因是 他们往往彼此相似。
There's two old adages : " Birds of a feather flock together ." And " Opposites attract." 有两个古老的谚语: “物以类聚,人以群分” 和“异性相吸。”
adages:n.谚语;格言;(adages是adage的复数); Birds of a feather flock together:难以捉摸的人;[谚]人以群分;物以类聚;一丘之貉;鸟以群分,物以类聚; Opposites:n.对立;对立面(opposite的复数);反义词;
Well, the psychological research suggests ... 心理学研究表明…
psychological:adj.心理的;心理学的;精神上的;
birds of a feather flock together, and we like people who are like us. 物以类聚, 我们喜欢和我们一样的人。
Question six: 问题6:
My coworkers are flirting . 我的同事在调情。
flirting:v.调情,打情骂俏;(flirt的现在分词)
I'm annoyed . What do I do? 我很烦,我应该怎么做？
annoyed:adj.恼怒;生气;烦恼;v.使恼怒;使生气;打扰;骚扰(annoy的过去分词和过去式)
Some researchers argue that for people flirting at work, flirting is good and it boosts creativity. 一些研究人员认为,对 在工作中调情的人来说, 调情是件好事,它能提高创造力。
boosts:增加;
But my own research suggests things are different for people who are watching or who are subjected to the flirting. 但我自己的研究表明, 对正在观看或被调情的人 来说,情况有所不同。
It can be awkward , right? 可能会很尴尬,对吧？
awkward:adj.尴尬的;笨拙的;棘手的;不合适的;
Witnessing flirtation in the workplace creates a sense of not knowing the rules, not knowing what's going on, or maybe seeing something that you shouldn't be seeing. 目睹职场上的调情 会让人产生不懂规矩, 不知道发生什么的感觉, 或者看到一些你不该看到的东西。
Witnessing:v.当场看到,目击;是发生…的地点;见证;(witness的现在分词) flirtation:n.调情;调戏;挑逗;不认真的考虑;
People who frequently witness flirting at work -- they actually report feeling less satisfied in their jobs, and they feel less valued by their company. 更常在工作中看到职场调情的人—— 他们其实报告对工作的满意度更低, 他们觉得公司对他们的重视程度更低。
satisfied:adj.满意的:满足的:v.使满意:使满足;(satisfy的过去分词和过去式)
They're more likely to give a negative appraisal of the work environment, and they may even consider leaving. 他们更可能对工作环境作出负面评价, 并且他们甚至可能考虑离职。
appraisal:n.评价;估价(尤指估价财产,以便征税);估计;
For women, this association can be even stronger. 对于女性而言,这种联系会更加强烈。
association:n.协会;关联;联想;交往;
This appears to be the case even when people report not being bothered by the flirting. 即使人们说 他们不介意调情,情况似乎也是如此。
bothered:adj.烦(恼)的; v.使(某人)烦恼;
It's true even when they say they enjoy it. 这是真的,即使他们说他们喜欢它。
So, a flirtatious environment really could be toxic . 所以,轻浮的环境真的有害。
flirtatious:adj.轻浮的;调情的;爱调戏的; toxic:adj.有毒的;中毒的;
Question seven: 问题7:
Do I need a policy on workplace relationships? 我们需要职场关系方面的政策吗？
policy:n.政策,方针;保险单;
You certainly need a policy on a sexual harassment , and I think most HR departments recognize that. 你当然需要关于性骚扰的政策, 我认为很多HR部门都认识到这一点。
sexual harassment:n.性骚扰; recognize:v.认识;认出;辨别出;承认;意识到;
But for the kind of consensual behavior we've been talking about, it's a little different. 但是对于我们一直在讨论的 两厢情愿的行为, 这有点不同。
consensual:adj.交感的;在双方同意下成立的;
As much as people in HR would love to wave a magic wand and say, "Thou shall not fall in love at work," HR部门的人都想挥舞一根魔杖说 “不能有办公室恋情”
wand:n.魔杖; v.用扫描笔在…上扫描条形码; fall in love:v.坠入情网;坠入爱河;相爱;爱上;
it's just not realistic . 这不够现实。
realistic:adj.现实的;现实主义的;逼真的;实在论的;
Emotional connection and sexuality is who we are. 情感联系和性造就了我们。
Emotional:adj.情绪的;易激动的;感动人的; sexuality:n.[胚]性别;性欲;性征;性方面的事情(比如性行为或性能力);
I kind of want you to flip the script a little bit. 我想让你们把这个脚本稍微翻一下。
flip:n.浏览;空翻;轻抛;捻掷;v.迅速翻动;按(开关);按(按钮);开(或关)(机器等); script:n.剧本;电影剧本;笔迹;广播(或讲话等)稿;v.为电影(或戏剧等)写剧本;
I encourage HR to really think more broadly about their role in not necessarily stamping out office romance, because I don't think that's realistic, but how do I help create a workplace climate and culture 我鼓励HR从更广泛的角度考虑 他们在办公室恋情中所扮演的角色, 因为我认为这是不现实的, 但我如何帮助营造 一种工作氛围和文化,
broadly:adv.明显地;宽广地;概括地;露骨地;粗鄙地; necessarily:adv.必要地;必定地,必然地;
where people feel respected for their individual contributions , not for their appearance or their gender, or their personal relationships? 让人们因个人贡献而感到受尊重, 而非外表和性别, 或者他们的私人关系呢？
individual:n.个人;有个性的人;adj.单独的;个别的; contributions:n.捐款;捐资;定期缴款;贡献;促成作用;(contribution的复数) appearance:n.外貌;外观;外表;
So the larger question is, how do you make sure people are valued and respected? 所以更大的问题其实是, 你如何确保人们被重视和尊重？